At wit's end!
Just over a year ago, I left my job to move closer to my mother and step-father. She has Alzheimers and he has COPD and emphysema. He has 2 bouts of pnuemonia last year which has left him in worse condition than my mother ( and Mom is currently in stage 6 of Alzheimers). My problem is, although I moved here to be closer to them, I am now caring for the 2 of them for a minimum of 12 hrs per day. I make all meals, clean, do laundry, shopping, transport them to medical appointments, etc. My step-father keeps complaining that his electric bill increased by more than $100 per month when I moved up here and he wants to be reimbursed. I am NOT working and my husband and I are on a very limited income. We barely have enough to make our monthly bills and buy groceries and gasoline so he can go to work. We live in my daughter's RV in my parent's driveway. I prefer not to move into the house with them because the TV blares from the time he gets up and he requires the TV to be off when he goes to bed. He will not let anyone watch what they want on the TV and will not put another cable box in the house. He offered to let us stay in the master bedroom, but will not allow my cat in the house and will not let me empty the closet so we have room for our own clothes. He refuses to buy vegetables, because he doesn't like to eat them. He also treats Mom terribly. Is there a way for me to move my mother into a facility without his blessings? He won't let me take her for a much needed haircut and perm, he won't pay for anything for her. He tells her all the time that she doesn't have any money because he was the one who saved it for years. Although she worked most of her life. I'm not sure where to turn. Any ideas? Also, I would like to note that I do not get paid anything for my 12 hour days/7 days a week. He refuses to hire help so I can take a break once in awhile. He is on Hospice care and they will bring someone in to help him if I need a few days off, but they cannot care for my mother because she does not qualify for Hospice yet. All other siblings live more than 1200 miles away and he only has one daughter living who refuses to get involved.