Your care for your parent is noble.

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Although your care for your parent is noble. However, your energy and enthusiasm will be drained from this commitment. Bring in professional medical staff. Your parent deserves the best and you deserve a rest.


Who are you talking to, Chris? Is this a follow-up from another thread?
Hi Chris,

I think its hard for so many caregivers to recognize this. We all want to be the superhero and do it all. But what you are saying is so true.
Chris, that might apply for situations in which medical care (such as home health care) for family is needed, but it doesn't apply to private duty care, which is often needed b/c family can't do all the housework and needs to hire additional help. And that kind of help is out of pocket expense.

I'm not a trained medical professional and would never consider doing medical work anyway.
Even though I am tired now,I gave my Mother the best care a daughter could and our recipe helped keep her alive and with us,when being in a NH or hiring other caregivers wouldn't have worked.I took her to every medical appointment,hospitalization,E.R,radiations,you name it and I lifted and loaded the heavy oxygen tanks and wheelchair by myself and I'd do it all again in a heartbeat just to have her back with me.I wouldn't call myself noble but I would call myself devoted.I Loved her and wanted to help her.She was Always there for me.Nine and a half years we made it and now there is plenty of time to rest.
My mother's needs at this point are not medical in nature, but they can be consuming nonetheless. She needs someone to drive her to her many medical appointments, take her shopping and on errands, make her meals and clean up after them, pour her beverages and bring them to her, take care of sundry household tasks such as opening and closing windows, changing light bulbs and batteries, etc. It is difficult to maintain an immobile elder in their own home. There's a ton of work and all of it falls to someone else. But, since she can't afford assisted living (and would never accept it anyway), the only alternative would be to have her live with one of her children, which she also wouldn't accept and none of her children would either. That length of time between when a person can't manage on their own and when they're frail enough to require nursing care can be many years, sometimes a decade or more. I've been taking care of my mother for almost 7 years now (but who's counting)? With no end in sight, at least not anytime soon.

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