I share caregiving responsibilities with an agency caregiver because I have fibromyalgia. Some days it's hard to get out of bed because the day before, I overdid myself caring for mom. I am on disability and am thankful I can work
I have no joy or hope in my life because the caregiving never ends. I want my life back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Most days I tell myself I can't do this anymore. Even though I live alone, I take the job home. I am rambling now..i need a vacation so I"m taking one....I'm going to go to an in person support group tomorrow. I'm angry because I reach out to all of my friends now. I feel very alone.
mom's bone on bone shoulder pain is excruciating. She's on narcotics and they're doing zero for her. She can barely reach out to pick up a pen or bring a fork up to her mouth. She suffers and there's nothing I can do about it. I suffer and it seems like nothing I've tried for fibro is helping. Maybe I'm having a pity party but I need to reach out for support. I feel like none of my friends would have a clue about what I go through.
Today I had a reaction to a drug they started on me for fibromyalgia. It caused me mood swings and I wished under my breath that mom would just die already. Is that what caregiving comes down to? Is that who we become when we're burned out?
I am sorry but I needed to vent big time. THANKS FOR LISTENING!