It was 8 months ago today that I lost my Best Friend , younger Brother and I still can't deal with his loss, I don't think I ever will.

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It doesn't get any easier to deal with actually it gets worse, I no longer see a point to anything. My life has somehow turned into something I never would have expected. I've become very stand offish to the ones around me who want to help I suppose because I don't believe anything will help. I went from loving to be a caregiver for my brother and also my Mother & my two special needs sisters to being homeless, after my older sister found out I was going to turn her in for financial elder abuse and financial abuse of my two younger sisters she made up a story that's unbelievable which got me out of the way so she could continue to steal, abuse. Its been two months and I don't know where I will be staying at tomorrow . Confused, shocked and stunned.


I don't know what to say, Touched, but I can't let this go off the bottom of the page without saying a word. Your brother is not gone. He has just stepped through (yes, stepped) to the other side.

Could you tell us a bit more about what happened with your sisters. It sounds like a very bad situation. I hope someone will know something that could help.
It sounds like you have a few different issues going on. Grieving your brother is one: he is in good hands, dear. Let go of that for the time being.
Are you able to do anything to effect the problem with your problem sister ?
Find a Family Law Attorney in town. He or she will help you. Don't worry, but deal with this to protect yourself. Praying for you:) xo
Well I have to younger sister's, 1 has mytonic dystrophy, my other younger sister is autistic & Mom is 89. My older sister has been making mom pay for her bills, makeup,gas,car insurance, hair dye, going out money, clothes etc. This has been going on since my sisters husband passed away 7 yrs ago also she takes moms atm card & takes whatever money she wants always overdrawing account, this is all social security money that's moms & my 2 younger sisters. Plus she very emotionality abusive to them. In December I told herto get a job or I'll turn her in to social security & APS , she got mad & her and her grown son attacked me in front of mom & sisters but I didn't press charges so not to upset mom more. Couple weeks later sheriff comes does welfare check they were told I was abusing mom and sisters, I had phenomena & had been asleep most of the day, my husband was with her chit chatting all day, sheriff talked to her 3 mins & said someone wsted my time. This kinda stuff keeps going on, sister is having everyone she knows to call aps cops etc. I guess the one who calls first wins...she got me kicked out Jan 30, I've been homeless since , don't even know where we're going to sleep tomorrow.Yesterday finally got a person of authority to listen to me and a surprise is coming to my older sister, but after all this its been to much I just don't care anymore. Hope ya'll understood that My thinking isn't good at this point. Got to go. Thank You
I am so sorry for all your troubles, but their is one thing that I know and believe, that their is a God, someone who cares about you , and will provide for you , you have to have faith that their are better days ahead. I was a caregiver for my mother who died of pancreatic cancer, caregiver for my sister who died of lung cancer, and now I am a caregiver for my brother who is mentally challenge. It get so over barren sometimes that you want to say what's the use in it all. But I looked to my God to give me strength, and guidance. I have found a church with loving members that surround me with love. I don't know if you believe in God, and his divine power, but he is so wonderful, and he will open door's you never believe would open for you . God Bless You, he is already opening doors for you
I wonder why your older sister doesn't apply for disability and then she wouldn't need to be spending any moneys that aren't hers.
What do you mean by "I had phenomena"?
nanagirl71, Oh yes I do believe in God I died 3 times in one day in 2006 at age 48 my heart just stopped never knew I had a problem come to find out I had 3 rd degree AV heart block and a pacemaker was put in. I had the most amazing experience I saw myself wearing a white robe & there was no light like I've heard people say, to me it was so pure it was bright and the peace I felt I can't begin to explain it in human terms. I am just overwhelmed with what's happened I just don't know how much more I can deal with, I am trying . :-)
ruralwannabe, My older sister is perfectly healthy she didn't have to work her entire marriage & she has no intention of working now in fact in the past 4 years she has sued two different businesses got well over $100,000 and still took mom & my 2 disabled sisters money. She's a piece of work let me tell ya. :-)
Touched by an Angel, I can relate to one thing.....losing a younger bro. I lost mine six years ago, and it still hurts to the bone. I loved my kid brother so very much and thought he'd be there forever. He died suddenly, and it was a crushing blow to our family. He and I were very close. So many things seemed to be unsettled, and I went into a depression for two years. I thought I'd never feel happiness again. I came out of it.....finally. No meds. I just kept going, somehow, battling my way through, and I knew that my Mom, and others (my brother's son) needed me. It gave me the strength to lift myself out of the fog. I hope this gives you hope to know that you will come through the sadness and despair of losing your dear younger brother. Sounds like you have lots of troubles with your family. Keep yourself strong, because your Mom needs you, right? So stay strong for her, and don't let the sister get you down. Karma will sort things out, in the end.
There is no time line for grieving and everyone will grieve differently and for different lengths of time depending on the type of relationship that they experienced. Second, 8 months is not long at all so allow yourself much much more time. There are benefits of self healing behaviors and rituals (my graduate thesis) that might help you. I didn't delibertly set out to experience rituals after my father died but that is what I ended up doing because I was finding so many ideas in the things i was reading. (the following are not rituals) I wore my fathers WWII dog tags..I cuddled up in his bathrobe, and even now, I think if you supply the post office (go online) you can submit a photo and they will make postage stamps for you. To this day if I need his presense I put on the dog tags and on my birthday or his I still wear his robe. I celebrate his birthday nd if he were here with cake and a brithday cake always says happy birthday sweets because that is what he called me...i keep his legacy alive by flying the american flag on day that it should be displayed (plus the above) and more. I guess in a nutshell i continue to include my father in the things I do in my current life. some need to hold on, some need to let go i chose to integrate him into my existing life. He is always a part of my life....the pain of course has lessened and it will for you too over father died in march several years ago. 9 months later i was still grieving and christmas was upon us..i didn't really wish to celebrate at all but deided to put up a tree covered with blue lights depicting my feelings of sadness (being and feeling blue)...that's all i did so when the light were on i thought of dad and not all the glam of ho ho ho and presents. it was a very spiritual season for me. You can google rituals and find so much...don't limit yourself to loss of a brother as many things that parents of still borns and the like do can be applicable to us...please let us know how you are doing both regarding your brother and your living situation. you did the right thing if you reported abuse.
Well 2012 has not been a good year, my mother in law decided to quit dialysis, I learned to do home dialysis on her to make its easier for her, I don't blame her I doubt I'd ever start it if I needed it, then I loose my brother then 1 month later our Grand daughter. Now all this drama because my sister can keep abusing & stealing, I just want to give up.

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