I am an only child and I am the only caregiver for my mother. We have not had a good relationship due to her being a very sharp and unloving mother during my 52 years. She got pregnant with me when she was a teenager and has always told me that I messed up her life because she never wanted children. My father passed away 7 years ago and then 4 years ago, when my mother was 65, I started noticing signs of dementia.
One of the blessing I have accepted regarding her Alzheimer's Disease is that it seemed her personality changed and she was loving and kind and pleasant. I was 51 years old before she ever told me that she loved me or became physically affectionate with me. I have totally forgiven my mother for her treatment all these years. I even gave up my job last April to care for her so she could stay in her home and remain as independent as possible.
Recently, she has stopped taking her medication on a regular basis. I'm with her but she "pretends" to take it and then I find it in a drawer, or a tissue, or on the bathroom floor where she is flushing it down the toilet. She becomes very aggressive and verbally abusive without the meds. Lately she has started saying that she will know when "the time comes" to end it all. I don't know if this is just more verbal abuse because she sees how it upsets me or if she is capable at this point to really care out such a plan. I've spoken with her neurologist and geriatric psychiatrist but they are limited in their advice. I'm doing all I can to make sure she has a good quality of life, i.e., traveling, visiting friends, etc., but I'm just not sure how much more I can keep this up, especially now that she's has started being suspicious of me. She tried to kick me out of her house yesterday and told me to go get a life. So hurtful since I feel like I've given up my life for her care.