Adjusting to a new level of dementia.
The last week has brought change. Mom's mental functioning is not so good. She is still walking and taking care of her activities of daily living, but something has drifted in her mind. She sits and doesn't seem to realize how much time has passed. It is like her mind has turned into a butterfly -- hard to explain. She knows the day and time, but doesn't seem to place herself in it. Sometimes she just stares at nothing.
I should be compassionate with the changes, but I'm finding that I'm just irritable adjusting to the new normal. Maybe it's because I realize that the little bit of freedom I have now is about to vanish and that I'm going to have to make some big decisions soon. Wouldn't it be nice to have a family that cared about now? I hate making all the decisions alone. But I guess someone has to be the grownup in the family. (I think that is what I'll say to them.)