My sister who is manipulative and abusive has just moved in with my mother.
If something happens to mom, does she get the house? I have been helping my parents for years. As they started to age my family started to pick up some of there responsibilities like yard work and such. My mother suffered with a lot of pain from crippling arthritis and sciatica. My dad did all the running as it was to much for her to do a lot of walking. My dad was diabetic and had heart surgery years earlier. We did not want them doing heavy physical labor. Dad ended up with cancer and I took him back and forth to all his doctors and picked up on the chores they had, doing more and more until Dad became really sick and I moved in with them because he could no longer care for himself or my mother. I prepared all their food and took care of the house. I took time off of work to do this. After Dad passed I stayed with mom for a while to help her adjust to being on her own now. Eventually I had to go back to work, but I stopped by to see mom every Monday morning before work and then I came to stay with her from Wednesday until around midnight on Friday. I called her to check in on her on the days I was not there. My mom loved that I was there with her, we would have coffee in the morning and we had dinner together, we had a movie night and on Fridays I would do her errands, like doctors appointments and banking, etc., I would also cook up a storm so that she had meals to eat until I came back on Monday with some fresh food. Then I would go crazy and clean her entire house and trim her yard up. She wanted for nothing, when she went to bed at night she would look me in the eyes and tell me how much she loved me and thank me for all that I did, that made it all worth while, to know that she was comforted by my being there for her. I took super good care of her, no one could have provided better care for her.
I have two sisters, one helped out, but soon after dad passed away she became bitter and nasty, shutting me out of her life, when we were actually very close. The other sister never helped, she didn't have time for my mother. After a few years my mother started to change, she was shutting me out to. I was the one exhausting my life to care for her, yet she was doing things and never telling me anything about it. She stopped sharing her life with me, and she was never like that before. Never asked about my family anymore, it was all about my sister and her kids who were just like there mother. They spent there lifetime together fighting. They started telling people nasty lies about me, even trying to turn my own kids against me, trying to get to my daughter in law. My kids know the situation all to well. They know what my sisters are like and what their kids are like and who did what for who over the years. My daughter in law (as well as my kids) was also a victim or witness to their cruelty, selfishness and stupidity on several occasions. All they did was turn my family against them , not me. The problem is mom is being manipulated by them. I believe she has been brainwashed. They have both said nasty things about my mother in my presence, like she is taking advantage of the situation and that she is selfish.
My mother never took advantage of anyone, but even if she was I don't know why it would matter to them, they weren't making any sacrifices for her. My mother was crippled and could not do anything really, if she spilled something, she could not wipe it up, she could not sweep, or do laundry cut grass or wash floors or change sheets or any of the many other chores that come with life. I would do that for her because it needed to be done and she could not do it. I also live about an hour away, work full time and have my own home and family with all the chores and responsibilities that come with it. Where did I get all the time, well I neglected my family and myself, but it was all good because we all loved my mother and father when he was here. I sacrificed my sleep and found strength and energy in the love that I had for them. My sister has her name on all my mothers accounts and has now moved into her house. My mother has recently gone through a surgery which she never told me about, her excuse was that she doesn't call anyone. One day I was on my way to work but going to stop and see her first. When I got there, there was a note saying she had gone to the hospital, so I went to the hospital, in the mean time they had called my house wanting permission to do a procedure on my mother. When I got to the hospital they said it was taken care of, they had gotten a hold of my other sister and she took my name off the list and could no longer tell me anything about my mother. I would have to talk to my sister. My sisters don't talk to me. My sister actually hit in the hospital one day. She lied to my mother about. First my mother told my daughter in law that my sister did not hit me, now she says that she only hit me accidentally. It was deliberate, my mother was sleeping at the time. My life is a nightmare. Please help