We just found out today that my mothers kidneys are starting to fail because of her diabetic issues. She is in a nursing home. Dont know

Started by

how much time she has left. Am unfamiliar with end of life issues. Anyone had this experience? What should we expect? I am just trying to prepare myself so that I can deal with it when it happens. Mom has already said she never wants her life to be prolonged if sick.

1 Comment

3930 helpful answers
Have you contacted hospice? This is what they do. They will have a chaplain (if you choose) there for your mother and for the family. They know how to handle pain so they will keep her comfortable so you can all have some quality time, rather than having her die in pain.

I'm glad you know her wishes so you don't have to wonder.

Most of us don't want to die in pain if we can help it. If she is dying, she needs to be made as comfortable as possible (in my view), and hospice is trained for this. They have volunteers, nurses, and if she is at home she should be able to stay there. If she is in a home, hospice works seamlessly with the staff at the home. I’ve been through that twice and it was a Godsend.

One thing I'm going to write an article on, as it's come as a shock to me, but there are many more hospices popping up. They used to be pretty much all exceptional, but there are some people now going for the money. So, sadly, even with hospice, you need to be vigilant. If you have choices in your locale, ask for references to you can talk to people who have used their services.
Take care. This is a hard time, but there is help for both of you.

Carol

Keep the conversation going (or start a new one)

Please enter your Comment

Ask a Question

Reach thousands of elder care experts and family caregivers
Get answers in 10 minutes or less
Receive personalized caregiving advice and support