Tired and drained
My mom was placed in a room yesterday and will be getting a roommate today. She was not happy, in rehab she had a private room. Her health is really failing. The rehab was wonderful to get her somewhat mobile again. The nurse called me yesterday and they are testing my mom today for congestive heart failure which she has been in before. She has anemia that they have yet to be able to explain. Renal failure having chest pains on occasion and I was asked yesterday if she had another breathing chest pain episode did I want her taken to the ER I said no. The ER is a very stressful situation for her and abosolutely nothing can be done for her there that cannot be done at the nursing home. She asked if she could be given morphine to help ease her breathing problems. I could go on on. I have to say my stress level was better when she was first admitted I have been taking care of her for 15 years. Now I am just sad and some days absolutely guilt ridden because now she is in the tiny little part of a room ( I did decorate). I really just wish it would just be over soon for her and I both. Only child, this is hard and exhausting. My mind will not stop thinking of ways to make a situtaion better that just cannot be made better. She did tell me yesterday she was going to come home with me because they nursing home was taking all her money. I in turn had to tell her again that she requires more care than I can give...I do realize this is a rambling letter without a question, just some much needed therapy from the ones that understand. I am tired and my brain is tired..