My Mom

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I just found this site and am hoping to get some help. My mom has always been healthy, outgoing and independent. She is in good health, diabetes under control, BP under control. My concern is that within the last year especially the past couple of months her behavior has really changed.

Mom moved in with me and my daughters 12 years ago due to me being a single parent and we really got and still do for the most part get along. Over the past year though something's been changing with her. One of the things she's done for a couple of years is say words that are totally not the right words. This doesn't happen all the time and we've all kinda just laughed about it. My main concern is that for the past couple of months she zones out/doesn't pay attention to us when we're talking, etc. Not all the time; but enough that I'm starting to worry. Some examples have been: she'll be right there with you and you ask her a question and she doesn't acknowledge the questions until you practically yell which in turns get her mad. I've asked her numerous times and she's told me that she had her hearing checked at the doctor and it was fine. That she has "selective" hearing. It's almost as she's become obsessed with her TV shows and sitting in her chair watching TV. If you ask her something she either ignores you or will yell back that she's busy. My daughter's Bday was the other day and after dinner I was in the family room with her and told her that I was going to go up and cut the cake, etc. She just continued sitting in the chair and said to bring her a piece. This is not at all like my mom. I went up, my other daughter and I sang happy BDay, etc. and my mom never came. We had an argument the following day and she said she didn't realize we were doing that. It's like the connection that was there that you would know that we're singing etc would automatically triggerd her to come up like she's always. But it never did. She gets very upset when questioned as to why and her response most of the time is that she doesn't know. She will tell us that she's not paying attention to us when we finally can't stand it any longer. It's like an alien has taken my mom. She never was like this before. It's like she's in her own world sometimes and things that were automatic to her aren't any longer. She's depressed and after two years has finally agreed to try different medications. The only way to describe it is sorta like OCD where she's just obsorbed into herself. She still drives, works part-time and has normal periods during the day.

I guess I'm wondering what I can do to make sure this is something that has to do with normal aging or is this something else. She gets very upset when I mention that I'd like to go to the doctor with her. She's voiced to both me and my sister that she basically thinks I'm going to tell him she's nuts. Which I know she's not and I would never do that to her. I've told her that it's very hurtful and when asked she doesn't know why she thinks I would do that. Sorry this has gone on so long and it probably is very confusing but I just needed to vent and see if others have dealt with things like this. Wasn't sure where to put this. Thank you.

1 Comment

I can relate to many of the things you describe. Has she seen a Neurologist? Have you voiced your concerns to her physician? I sent a list of them to my mom and dad's doctor, but instead of him talking to me, he read that list to mom, and she denied everything, so be cautious. But sounds like she's scared, and you a very loving and concerned daughter. Let us know how things turn out, and take care!

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