My Father passed away in July and not two weeks later my Mother had a heart attack. Now Mom is feeling better for which I am extremely

Started by

thankful. However now she is saying I don't want to take these medicines and I don't want my lifeline. She is 83 and very frail. She cannot comprehend that if she doesn't take the meds she will have another heart attack. What can I do??? I really have tried to reason with her, but she is not reasonable or rational...


Is your mother just tired of it all? I mean since she had a close call with dying and her husband is already gone, does she NOT want to just keep going on? Also I understand many times after a heart attack, people have a bout of depression, is this what's going on or is it something else? I would ask that she explain her thinking about this.
thank you I do think that some of it is that she misses my Dad, of course... I also think she is being somewhat stubborn. My Dad, God love him was always the voice of reason. I believe my Mom has some Alzheimer's disease or dementia. She was on namenda and it has run out and she refuses to refill it. She says she cannot afford it and that is really NOT the case... She is not wealthy, but she is not poor either. I do not want to be to stern with her(that is not my nature anyway) because I know she is grieving... but to be real honest so am I and I would like her to cooperate. I am sorry if that sounds selfish I don't mean to be...
I don't think that you are being mean or selfish. I have a daily struggle to get my mother to take meds and understand your frustration. My father just passed away in July, too, so we are both grieving and trying to be reasonable at the same time. Be nice to yourself and know that unless your mother has a form of dementia, you truly cannot force her to do anything. I hope you will stay in touch with us because this site has helped me to understand the difference between what I can do and what I cannot do.
I am new to this site and am hoping I will learn to not beat myself up over what I can't do. My Mom has dementia and is usually reasonable about doing what I ask her to do. My Dad on the other hand is very stubborn. He had a stroke and sometimes refuses to take his medication. His mind is perfectly fine and he feels he should be allowed to make these decisions, which when all is said and done is true. However, I think that the stroke did cause some depression and I mentioned this to his doctor and he was prescribed an anti depressant. I really think that this has helped a lot. With that being said, you would need to find a way to get your Mom to take the medication, but it might be something you want to discuss with her doctor.

Keep the conversation going (or start a new one)

Please enter your Comment

Ask a Question

Reach thousands of elder care experts and family caregivers
Get answers in 10 minutes or less
Receive personalized caregiving advice and support