I really hate Facebook, everyone has a wonderful life on there, while I'm in the spiritual battle of my life!

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I took a week off didn't call my folks it was so painful. They're still in the nursing home. The court date for Guardianship 1/27, of which they both have no idea is going to happen. I called them today dad said they have Pneumonia so I had to bother the nurses to find out what the heck is going. They said they've been trying to call me for days but get only a busy signal, everyone else gets through I don't know what they're doing on their end!
I hate that my folks are where they are miserable sick, their house hasn't been occupied in months. Mother said the sisters called to Killer Ant 2 to volunteer to go house sit REALLY I BET! I don't know what's the truth when I speak to them, all I know is I'm an emotional wreck afterwards. My dad did tell me he loved me, and I was able to pray with mother on the phone for their comfort!
I also decided to torture myself further hence " I HATE FACEBOOK" title summary I went back on facebook to see my X is having the time of his life and I just imploded from their. I HATE FACEBOOK!!!!!!! What I really can't stand is I' scared, alone, in need of comfort, jobless, damn it I'm depressed! I have a blood line that if I didn't know we were related I wouldn't speak to them after the first introduction. I've been comparing old classmates lives and successes to my upside down screwed up lousy life wondering what flyin fayhenie is next! Yes I'm whiny and miserable and if I didn't have to be around me I'd leave but I don't have a choice.
Sorry guys I just needed to vent I'm in need of a rescue, I'm so lost right now!!!!! I've got to believe God has something wonderful on the other side of this! I just can't see the other side, I'm dying to so many of my old bad behaviors, thought processes, belief systems about what's important and what's real!
DOES ANYONE know what I'm saying...... I feel so damaged I may never come back. Talking the job counselor gave me know hope at all for a future. I feel NUTS, TOTALLY NUTS RIGHT NOW! Where's the tuna can's the blue tights, my tiara and the magic bracelets cause I'm coming UNDONE!

26 Comments

Tuna Cans? I don't understand what tuna cans are for.
I understand. You are completely overwhelmed. It's a horrible way to feel.
We understand tuna cans :D I'm sure emjo will be around in a little while.

First off, the practicalities. Unfriend your ex if you haven't already and don't be tempted to put his name in the search. Curiosity will just make you feel worse, and you don't need that right now. After a while your anger at you ex will fade and he will be nothing to you.

Next figure out how you're going to find that new job. I have a feeling that getting a job will be the biggest boost to your self esteem. Good self esteem is the best armor in this world. Write a killer resume and brush up on some needed job skill. Practice the standard interview questions so you can wow them.

A month from now things will probably look more orderly. Something I do when I'm going through a bad time is to tell myself that this, too, shall pass. Sometimes we just have to see how we want things to be, then work to make them that way.

Now if I follow my own advice... Easier to tell others than it is to do it myself. But we are getting there.
JessieBelle is right on....work on yourself. As for Facebook and your Ex...remember people only post the good stuff, I am sure he still has bad days and problems.
Zoo life, please don't undervalue yourself and what you are in the process of doing for your parents. Dad is probably misdialing as it gets harder for him to accurately carry out sequences and problem solve. Dad probably won't give accurate information, do make sure the staff calls you with the things you want them to. If it makes no sense, that's probably because it makes no sense! Guardianship is a big, intimidating process, and can be expected to take up a lot of time and energy...even if you have all you ducks in a row for it, and even if it were not for all the desperate emotions it engenders to boot. Breathe, and tell yourself it's gonna be OK...you are doing you best to do the right things here. We're pulling for you and we hope to hear how it all works out!!
im not sure you understand how facepunch works so here ; my weekend was so awesome. my bff stopped in ( the obnoxious renter girl from upstairs) and we had the greatest time ( listening to her sitting on my couch, smoking weed and hacking her guts up ) today i cross country skied down the best mountain ( walked to the bottom of my drive and fell on my ass in the slush 3 f-in times ) then came back to the lodge and had a 5 star dinner ( i made a pancake) ill submit the photos later after ive sorted out the erotic ones ( took a selfie sitting on the sh*****) .
so there you go zoolife. when i went to grade school we were taught to read between the lines to determine what was really being implied.
Zoo-ie, everything is going to be so much easier when you get the conservatorship. Your folks are really in a state where they need help and they need YOU!

When you are no longer swimming against the tide to get the proper care that your parents deserve, everything will become easier in your personal life as well.

Practice Law of Attraction. What do you want and focus on dat and draw it to you. Look briefly at where you are, think concretely about where you want to be and the method to get there will manifest in your life.

Desire and belief are the key. You will only have what you want if you believe you can have it!
Comparing your life to those on facebook is a 100% guaranteed way to feel bad, especially if you are having a tough time.

All you are doing is comparing a "greatest hits" to your every day life. What I mean is, generally people do not post on FB or social media, bad things. No one talks about the job loss, debt, divorces, and the general low points everyone has in life on the social media. So what you are left with is a lot of friends posting only great things, new job, new car, new gf/bf etc. So looking at it makes a person feel as if their life is not as good as all their friends.

Take it all with a grain of salt. Maybe start posting the good things that happen during you day to FB to show the world, and yourself that there are good things happening in your life to celebrate.
You guys are the best thanks for all your comments what a lift! Captain you crack me up! PS the tuna cans all 3 strategically placed the tiara, and magic power bracelets, All Emjo the outfit that we are wearing in 2014 to take back our power year, Queenism, just some fun to for laughs. Carolyn I'm going to try the visualization, just need to find a dream! Jessiebelle, Vstefans, Overwhelmedsigh, Minutewomen Inc, you guys are priceless. This Phoenix will rise once again from the ashes medication will help till then! Big Hugs to all!
Eye of the tiger, girl!

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