Getting Father to move

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How do I get my father with dementia to move to an assisted living facility with his wife when he refuses ?

4 Comments

Get a letter of capacity from his physician, file for guardianship/conservatorship, and then viola, you can get him to move to ALF. This is how I had to do it with my father, moving day is day after tomorrow, WOOP WOOP! Good luck to you!
Every situation is different - where is he living, what were his wishes before he developed dementia, and did he appoint anyone to be his representative with a durable power of attorney for healthcare.

Good luck to you.
3930 helpful answers
Wesley, you are facing a frustrating and common problem. You could try having you county social services come in and do a welfare check (once his wife moves, he may not be able to take care of himself). Generally, it's good to get a third party involved, as so often they won't listen to "the kids." Is there a doctor or pastor, priest or Rabbi who could help? A good friend?

Once he sees his wife adjust and enjoy life without the worries and inconvenience of a house, that may help. Good luck with this. Sometimes it's better to back off and find a way for him to make the decision. Often it's just a case of not wanting to be told what to do.

Carol
I don't know about poor welsley, but in my dad's case, backing off only made his situation worse. Since he had dementia, his cognitive, and communications skills, and poor judgement, made him an even bigger candidate for further Elder Financial Abuse, self-neglect, and on and on. And it is true, they, just like children, do not like being told what to do.

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