She needs a friend but won't warm-up to me.


after seeing the devestating results of the disabled and/or elderly being forgotten and ignored by family members, i decided to try to make a difference in some lives around town. one lady at 81 has 3 estranged daughters [if you can believe that!] and im told is lonely and sad. i've seen her 4 times now and can't seem to befriend her the way i'd like. she's very nice i'm sure, but won't talk and often just wants to nap. she's on oxygen and a wheelchair. any ideas in how to pep her up and get her interested in what i bring and the walks outside we take? sometimes i wish i could just bring her home and treat her like a queen. but i can't. maybe she needs something more. meds? or what?

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thanks Austin and dsak. i appreciate your thoughtful answers. i'll keep trying. i know she likes chocolate and puzzels. so do i! maybe i could try a different time of the day. and maybe she'd prefer i call first. i'll check on that. oh yes, wouldn't a kitten be fun. even an old turtle might be interesting. thank you both, sooz

What you are attempting to do is wonderful, but not all seniors are like Ms. Threadgood in that great book, Fried Green Tomatoes at The Whistle Stop Cafe. I bet she looks forward to you showing up even though she may not be emotionally able to express that. Have you considered bringing along a kitten or puppy? If you happen to know her interests maybe you could share some magazines or books that are related to her interests. Don't give up, I'm sure you are accomplishing something positive for her.

I would just keep visiting for short periods of time -she probably is glad for the company but some people just do not know how to express themselves-I visit on former co-worker in her nursing home and she is very glad to see me but sometimes she falls asleep while I am talking to her and even calls me if I have not been in for a while- I have a feeling if you if you visit the same day of the week she will start looking forward to your visit-maybe you could bring her cookies or something she can enjoy after you leave, you are so good to take an interest in her and you may be her only visitor.