Don't know how to keep mom happy

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Mom is 99 yrs old and in a nursing home. She had been great for 95 years then the dementia started. that is when we advised to place her in a nursing home. We were taking her out to lunch every Sunday and for short rides sometimes during the week. On her 99th birthday we took her to lunch everything was fine until we went back to the home, She refused to get out of the car. She was crying saying she wanted to go home home to her mom. and where is her mom. Since then we have not been able to take her out for fear she would do the same thing. It is very hard to visit. We play games with her while visiting but then she will decide she wants to get out of there. She starts cyring and goes into an anxiety attack. The Dr has prescribed atavan for her when she gets like that but she refuses to take it. She has refused all medication. Has anyone out there been faced with a similar type of situation? We , my sister and I, don't know what to do.

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One of the best ways to handle the problem of her NOT wanting to get out of the car, is to tell her that you believe her "mother" is INSIDE! Call ahead and have the staff meet you outside if you feel you need help getting her out of the car.

Sometime medication is used incorrectly. Understanding her behavior can also be effective, if done properly. Find out what other methods the facility uses INSTEAD of drugs.

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