Disappointed my brother is not coming.

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My brother was supposed to be here next week for 2 weeks and my husband and I were going to take some time off together. We booked a hotel (the first night non-refundable) in Los Angeles and were just going to do cheap, touristy stuff. Graumann's Chinese Theater, Museum's, etc.. Nothing spectacular, but just the two of us. Unfortunately, my brother, who is on disability, and has had 17 previous back surgeries, has had a serious set back, and now needs another surgery. His neurosurgeon got him in next week, so the trip is off. Damn, I was really looking forward to that time away.


equillot, I am so sorry to hear this, especially after you had already made plans. I wish there was someone else who could come so you could do the things you wanted and maybe even visit your brother. I hope that his back is better soon.

Have you contacted your local Office of the Aging. There are times when they offer respite care for caregivers where you can place your loved one temporarily in a nursing home type setting for a week or so...this way you can get away.

It is not available in all areas but this may be something that you have the ability to access. I wish you luck.
Thanks Jessie & Tony. I wish there was someone who could come too. Mom is talking now about wanting to go to the museum, so maybe we'll take a day trip and take her with us. We bought a wheel chair for her that she has yet to use, and she said she'd be willing to use it. I don't necessarily feel the need to get away from her, just get away from HERE.

I'm not ready to put Mom in a nursing home for respite care. My brother will come down after he's well enough to travel in a couple of months. I managed to get a partial credit on his non-refundable airfare. I wouldn't go up and visit him - he has plenty of people up there to keep him company, and I'm 1100 miles away

Thanks for the suggestions and support. It feels good to know there is a place I can come just to express my disappointments, rants, raves and cheers.
Hopefully, you'll be able to re-schedule it soon. In addition, many airlines/hotels will make a one time exception to change a reservation. A manager can only make that decision, so it's best to call and ask to speak to a manager, and most likely they will let you do it one time. L.A. is a great place, and I'm sure you'll get there soon!
Yes, we live just east of L.A., in the Palm Springs area, so we've been there before, just haven't gone and done the tourist stuff, which we thought would be fun. But now Mom wants to go one of the museums (where the space shuttle is) that we were going to go to, so we'll just bundle her up and bring her along for a day trip. She seems to be doing better the past few days. Hope it lasts into next week.
What a huge disappointment!

It sounds like you are making the best of the situation. Day trips can be wonderful for elders. They suffer from cabin fever, too, and a change of scenery can be very therapeutic. And looking forward to the event can be therapeutic too! A bonus would be if it encourages her to accept the wheelchair when appropriate.

This will not be all fun and games for you and your husband and it won't be the carefree get-away you were looking forward to. But that will come later. And this will be special in its own way. I recommend taking lots of pictures (if the museum allows it -- if not, then pictures of the building etc.). Then Mom has the pleasure of looking forward to the trip, the trip itself, and visual memories after the trip.

Have a nice visit to the museum!

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