Angry and scared.

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Mom has been the hospital for the past week with another GI bleed. This time she went to a different hospital - the one closest to us, that is not her preferred hospital, because it doesn't have doctors. This turns out to have been a good thing. The last time she went in, they didn't do a colonoscopy, Big mistake. They just assumed it was the same old thing - diverticulitis - and waited for the bleed to stop, giving her blood as needed.

This time, they scoped her and found a mass. One that's been growing awhile. They biopsied it, but the results won't be back until at least Monday. Today they're going to do a cat scan, I guess to see what else it might have infiltrated.

Her hemoglobin is down to 9.3, she is having trouble remembering, and now she wants to come home and talk to her doctor before proceeding with surgery! She couldn't even reach her doctor until Monday, and wait times to get in are typically 2-3 weeks. The other hospital is the one that dropped the ball, and is also the one that is responsible for my father's death (long story, but we could have filed a malpractice suit, but chose not to). They are, however, much nicer as far as accommodations - the rich people/tourists go there and like to be in nice surroundings. She would have the same surgeon at either hospital. Her surroundings would change, and there would be a delay getting her treatment if she checks out. If she stays, they can do it immediately. Any suggestions on how to get her to see reason?


That does sound scary eguillot. Surely her doctor would not make her wait under the circumstances.Can you park on the doctor's phone until they agree to see her or at least consult with the surgeon? I think if it was me I would wait for the test results in order to get a better idea of timing. Is there a clergy person or family member that she will listen to about the importance of getting this taken care of immediately? I have medical poa so I can make those decisions if necessary. If you don't have that then is up to her, but it is so hard to watch someone with diminished capacity potentially make things worse. In terms of hospital comfort, that is important but if you aren't comfortable there, that counts for something too. You are under a lot of pressure eguillot, hope you can take some time for yourself and try to escape a bit. Good luck.
equillot, you have been going through so much. Big hugs to you and your mother. My first instinct was to go with the hospital that found the mass for the surgery. But then I thought that the other may have missed it because they got sloppy, knowing more of the history of your mother. Either hospital will probably do a good job with the surgery as long as the surgeon is competent.

I've often wondered what I would do if my mother had a mass that turned out to be cancerous. I figure I would leave the decision up to her, since it is her life. I've worried, though -- what if she can't choose anymore. It would be such a hard thing to decide for her. I am glad that your mother is still able to make decisions for herself. I hope she feels better when she gets the mass out and looked at. Fingers crossed that it is a benign growth!
That's a tough one! My father had colon cancer at 85, but had an aortic aneurism, which would have needed surgery first. He chose to let nature take its course. Sometimes I wish I had pushed him harder to go for surgery, but as it was, he had to endure months of disability, rather than years. I love, love, loved him, but he would have been a handful. The one thing I would change would be to give him more pain pills.
Mom made the decision to stay where she is. At least for today. My brother got here, and he helped make the case that moving was only going to delay things, and we promised to bring her food in as soon as she's off clear liquids.

I'll tell you this much - if this turns out to be colon cancer and Mom dies, the doctor who did not do the colonoscopy last March when she went to the hospital with the GI bleed is going to regret it.

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