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Ok here go's my FIL is living with us because he cant live by his self and my husbands brother and wife wont give up there jobs and dont want to care for him, they have offered to help out on weekends but now that stopped due to family having to move in with them, I have tried to find day programs for him but to no avail because the senior centers don't watch over them to make sure there they stay there he hasn't wandered yet. They other day care places have long waiting lists, I am in need of time to myself in my own home, I have 3 boys that need mom and my FIL is not nice to me and I feel like I have to walk on eggs to avoid confrontations with him no matter what I say or how I say it he get's angry and defensive with only me. My husband does help when he gets home from work but that doesn't really give me what I really need. Is this normal???

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I don't know what is "normal" but your situation sounds pretty typical. You are definitely not the only one taking care of a difficult in-law, with no help from other family members. Keep working on the day care places -- I hope your FIL in on those waiting lists!
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