I can also relate to your situation as my step-children are distant and do not talk or see their father much anymore. Their dad and my husband is a amputee now when he had part of his left leg removed last year. He has had type 2 diabetes for 25 years and it is a devastating disease. His kids just don't seem to get that their father will not be around forever. His siblings do not call either. My husband of 31 years just has me as his 24/7 caregiver. Is it fair to me probably not but I have excepted the truth that I am his wife and friend and his constant companion. The most difficult part was giving up work earlier than I would of but that is okay. I do go do an errand for an hour sometimes just to get away and be by myself. Remember to take care of you too!

I found that, except for my husband who was there for me when my mother was bedridden in my home, people are runners. For example, one "friend" whom I knew for decades disappeared only to come back after my mom died to ask for money when I sold mom's home. I was stunned and never responded to her. My other only support was from the hospice staff as relatives are across the Ocean. My mom had a wonderful aide who would sit and have a quick cup of coffee with me when she was finished bathing my mom and had her down for a comfortable nap. This small moment of conversation helped keep me sane throughout a very difficult time. I agree that those that have supportive friends or family are indeed very lucky.

If your parents were somewhat isolated back when their health was better, it will only get worse as their health goes downhill. There are not friends to call on, the church people only send thinking of you cards now and then, and if there are no close relatives to count on, then you are really sunk. I read with envy about older people, or anyone facing major illness, who has twenty or so people that they can depend on. They don't know how lucky they are.