Only a caregiver can understand another caregiver the best. They know each other about the struggles they are going through. Taking care of elders can be difficult. It is hard for friends who don’t have to take care of the elders to understand those difficulties. Another caregiver can understand that difficulty. Shari gives care to her parents and has same difficulties you face.
These days when there are many people who don’t even care their parents, caregivers are the best friends you could get. I have an elderly neighbor who could not move her own very well. She use an home care services named C-care from Toronto, c-care/services/home-care-services/ to take care of her daily life and the girl who take care of her is her best friend.

All of my close friends had slowly disappeared from my life once I started to help my parents six years ago.... I just didn't have time to be with those friends or I was just too tired to go places with them or even to telephone them. None of those friends could relate because they weren't caregivers for their own parents, topics were limited :P

Then I started doing volunteer work at a local hospital on Saturday mornings [it was the shift that my parents use to work before they retired].... a couple months later a young woman became my desk mate at the hospital information desk... I first thought what will we have in common as she is 20 years younger, born and raised in the Middle East.... then she opened up about the struggles of dealing with her in-laws who still lived in the old country but who were visiting here for an extended time....

BINGO, we had a real connection... and every Saturday for the past two years we caught up with the trials and tribulations of dealing with elderly parents and the high drama from her husband's siblings whom had different ideas on how to deal with the parents.

When I recently had surgery, she was texting me daily to see how I was doing. She was hoping for a quick recovery as she really missed *our gossip*, and I was the only person she could really vent about everything. That was a good feeling, that was a good friend :)

I also care for mom + dad. Mom kidney dialysis, dad mod to severe dementia. I do it all for them. Now dad wants to sleep all day. My older sister who lives close to my folks visits 10 min a day, doesnt lift a finger but boy she talks talks talks, tells my dad he better not sleep all day. I know he needs someone 3 times a week to work with him. He wont go to the mens group, now social. But I cant handle both parents responsibilities and sit with dad all day. No one supports getti.g help. Any suggestions. I need to get back to caregivers support groups. Thanks Bob.

I love this. I wish i did have a friend like Shari! I have a handful of friends who i worked with for 30 years and whom ive been through birth of our children, deaths, and so many of life's greatest ups and downs. I retired in August of this year at 58 due to our department being moved to Phoenix from Tulsa. My mother is 86 and has early/moderate stage dementia. My children are 24 and 30 and i have 2 grandchildren. My fathee passed 30 years ago and of my 2 older sisters, one passed 10 yrs ago and the other has cancer, has had 2 strokes, and needs care herself. I stuggle with wanting to keep mom independent in her home, yet knowing that the road ahead will be wrought with difficulty for me as her caregiver and knowing eventually i probably wont be able to keep her out of a facility. Not having anyone close who can relate to my circumstances, even though my friends love and care about me, is the most difficult. They have husbands and siblings, and have not cared for an elderly parent with dementia outside a facility. Its quite a lonely feeling dealing with the responsibility and fears without someone close to you who can relate. I plan on joining a support group soon so im hoping to connect with someone who shares my situation and with whom i can lean on and also support along this journey.