As a relatively young widow who is financially comfortable (but not wealthy), I've decided I'm not looking for anyone who wants a "nurse with a purse".

This is a really good content and i wish more website can be more vocal about issues like this. A victim right here and it is always a very complicated situation. I really feel people should be gentle on the victims of these scams because loving genuinely is never a crime. I almost lost $160,434 to a beautiful fake woman on Tinder who told me about bitcoin investment in 2018 and I decided to go all in a year later using her introduced platform but unfortunately It was all a planned process. I couldn't recover all my funds but more than 89% was recovered by this reputable solution company (Spirassp com) who are currently helping people recover from situations like this. I am forever grateful.

I wish to thank AgingCare for this eye-opening article!!
My goodness....fraud and deception appear to be everywhere in this godless society in which we live.
All seniors beware! And anyone else who actually goes online to find romance or any such thing.
I sure appreciate the advice and information given here, especially this article about Sweetheart Scams!
Thank you, AgingCare!! You are a blessing to the world!

They are ways to keep yourself from been scam online. But the most important thing you should know is whom to go to when you need help, and that is WERECOVERFUNDSLMT, They are trustworthy and reliable. If you need help submit a complain with them and am sure they will help you with every necessary to recover your money
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Hi there , i am always happy to see an article spreading the online dating scam technique .I went on a popular dating website Christain mingle to find love, I was contacted by a lady( a romance scammer) and we grew close over the next 2 months and she made me loan her almost $300,000 and later just disappeared. I was distraught and sought a solution.

My mother has sent thousands of dollars to con artists since last year. She believes she’s “helping them” battle cancer, etc. I contacted local law enforcement in person and left phone messages. Law enforcement said they couldn’t do anything and never returned my calls! That’s when I knew I had to take action and handle it myself. I shut down a second bank account she opened, I am linked to her only bank account and can monitor it. I can limit the amount of cash she withdraws and any check she writes has to clear through me first. Her financial advisor and company won’t honor any of her money requests without my approval. I also have administrator control on her telephone account and only allow family, friends and businesses she deals with (like a/c repair) to call her. All other callers are blocked. I live out-of-state and when I’ve been at her house, I grab any “charity” letters and respond with their postage, that she doesn’t live at the address anymore. These scammers and con artists are the worst!

This happened to my friend. Without getting into the details, we told her she was being scammed but she would not listen. She ended up giving the scammers $150k and when she finally realized she was scammed she committed suicide. It is hard to get the person being scammed to believe you.

I was on a Fishing dating site where there are tons of sweetheart scammers. I used to work for CFPB scamper unit so I new how to look up people once they gave me there phone number to text or call or use hangouts to communicate. They can also do the same to you. I have reported them to the web site & to the CFPB. Really not anything can be done. Be careful people they look for people of ALL ages. Be aware of scammers on line.

GrannyM, very true and thy as well after scoping obits , thy become a inner circle or visit places the senior widow goes too, then inner circle introduces them boom moves in within 2 weeks from a motel to home and smooth sailn for the wolf

A relative of mine had this happen to him. He wouldn't believe that she was using him. He was left with nothing, and of course she's no where to be found. It's horrible that people victimize the elderly. I hope there is a special place in hell for people who take advantage of the most vulnerable.

When my mother-in-law passed, a woman in her late 20s to early 30s came over from the hospice care agency. Apparently, my father-in-law, who is 86, had met her before. She was excited to see him. She was flirting with him. Touching him. Asking him a lot of questions about himself. She had remembered what he had told her before, and she was reciting the things he had told her back to him while telling him how great he was. She wanted him to use the agency's grieving services. She told him that she'd be there and that the grieving services would be able to help him get over the death of his wife and move on with his life. She also said that she'd stop by again to see how he was doing.

I glared at her. Somehow, I think that if I hadn't been there, she'd have come back again and again and have gotten as much money out of him that she could and then moved on. Somehow, I think that she's doing the same with the other elderly widowers she meets through the agency. I don't have any proof though. It was just my gut feeling. After all, there is nothing wrong with being friendly. It was just that she was too friendly and in a flirtatious way. Anyway, it was then that I realized that there are people who will try to take advantage of my father-in-law through the “sweetheart scam.” He's 86 and showing signs of dementia. His dementia is only going to get worse. I feel for the elderly who can no longer make decisions and have no one to protect them.

My mother-in-law just committed suicide this last Monday after becoming involved with one of these shameless scammers.

It is not just old people who are scammed by online dating. Old abusers and predators are on the prowl, too.

Great, helpful article. And THANK YOU! for saying what so many will not admit (and even you hedged it): Avoid Internet Dating (you added "if possible"). I've been scammed by "spiritual" people seeking "conscious, mindful" friends, perhaps LTR. Don't do it! Adding a note: If you are low-income, don't think you can't be scammed. It may be another low-income person who's looking for a free place to stay, medications to steal, laundry money to steal, free food and yes, sex. The low-income senior, especially one with disabilities such as myself, is just as vulnerable as someone who is wealthy. I think we feel even more "sorry" for someone, because "we know how it is." As Bob Newhart once said in a comedy skit, "Stop it!" Try not to be in such a rush to fill the lonely hours. Use the internet to join chat sites and talk to folks with similar (or different) interests. Enjoy a walk alone without someone stressing you out. If you've been scammed, get some counseling so you can feel better about yourself, and prepare for a real relationship some day. That's what I'm doing!

This wasn't a scam but it could have been. My Dad would talk to whomever called on the phone but he knew that he shouldn't give any any personal information.

It was local primary time and the politician surrogates were calling. One called Dad [94] to see if he needed a ride to go vote in the primary. Of course Dad said yes, got ready, and when the car arrived he left. He forgot to tell my Mom [97], and she was in a panic when she couldn't find him in their house.

Thank goodness it was legit, but it could have worked out so differently if it wasn't.

A month ago, I wrote about our friend Marilyn who got horrifically scammed and died without a penny to her name. My mother-in-law could be just as vulnerable. One of her famous lines is, "oh, so-in-so was so nice to me." And that's how it starts. Whether telemarketers, fund raisers, politicians, they are ALL trained to be super-nice to seniors, 'cause that's how they get the money from unsuspecting, naive souls! Unfortunately for the scammers, they have to come through my wife and I and we give them an earful they won't forget!

Excellent article, it is so easy to play with one's heart especially right after the passing of a love one. I have seen this over and over on the Dr. Phil's show regarding "catfishing".

My widowed Dad lives in senior living and before he even moved there, I asked him if I could help him with his billing and he said yes [I do have DPOA]. Thus I took home all the financial paperwork and bills, had everything transferred to my home address. Thus, anyone snooping around won't find a thing. And if they wanted anything, they would have to go through me.

I agree about neighbors. My beloved husband had to go, after caring for him for over 2 and a half years. Its been a nightmare, he has Alzheimer's along with other health issues.
No family between the two of us. When he left the neighbor up the road would come down and said he wanted to make sure I was ok. Being alone I was grateful. But something didn't feel right. I found out he and his wife were trying to find out more on the property. He has 5 boys into construction, and they buy and sell. I have decided to be alone. It's horrible knowing there are vultures circling....

I got caught in an exact scam and he thought he took me for a large sum of money, but I fooled him and got the vast majority back and will have it all back by November of this year. It was definitely a "Romantic Scam"

This happened to a dear friend of ours, about a decade ago. Marilyn lived in a senior community in San Diego County and was "befriended" by a couple that loved her--as long as Marilyn kept giving and giving, until there was nothing left and she died penniless. And like all predators, the scumbags just detached from their "prey" and went on to find another "host." A special note of caution: When these people lock on, they go out of their way to disconnect their victim from all communication with family and friends, lest their scam be discovered.

I hope there's a special place in hell for people like that!

although upsetting - it is good to continually make us aware of people doing these awful things- most people are looking for love and honest - the cases were people get caught up in this is amazing ....

Interesting article and good information. An increasing number of long term care facilities are seeing a benefit to residents using technology to gain access to the Internet and stay in touch with friends and family. They may provide computers or tablets to meet the demands of the baby boomers who demand this familiar technology. Seems like its not only a benefit for LTC consumers, but its also putting them in danger.

Sadly this has happened to my dad and there is nothing I can do about it. He was recovering in an assisted living facility and an aid befriended him in the one month he was there. She played her poor me song and accepted a check from him. We caught on and reported it to her boss. She was made to return the check. He was discharged and this woman gave him all of her contact info. She is 39 and he is 78. He professed he has never loved anyone like he loves her. This is post car accident (frontal lobe brain injury) and probably some advancing dementia. But since he was no longer a resident, the facility did not care that he continued to give her money. Long story short, they were married 9 months later. Adult protective services doesn't care. The state attorney general doesn't care. The police do not care. You can't prove anything - he is willingly forking over money to her left and right. It is so awful that there is nothing that can be done to stop this.

Is there anything I can do after the fact? My 84 yr old father gave a male who is his friends daughters partner. This male took $6000.00 from my father, and agreed to pay it back the old fashion way "Handshake agreement" My dad fell for it. As of yet there are no written papers with the scammer signature on it, although he did write a sticky posts note saying he owed my father money and will pay him back w/o any date or length of time period. Any advise how to get my father's money back?

Good article. I'm worried about this right now. My dad's "lady friend" of 10-12 years will most likely be moving onto his property, renting a mobile home, 75 feet away from him.
She has used him for years. It all started with him working for her but then the pay stopped but he liked her, wanted to have a relationship (sex) with her but she is 20 years younger and didn't want that. But she did want his expertise as a carpenter, use of all his yard equipment and his tools, use of his truck , etc. All without any payment to him.
My husband and I tried to talk to him about protecting his assets and also paying me to be his caretaker on a part time basis. We live 1.5 hours away, gas is expensive and we have special diets. It would be kind of like having two homes as my husband would be commuting back and forth. We asked him what did he want for his senior years, would he like an ass't living place (no), he wants to stay home. We agreed. We wanted him to stay home too BUT just in case we need to protect his assets.
He went to her and talked to her and came back and said "Zoe, says, 'DON'T LET THOSE KIDS PUT YOU IN A NURSING HOME! I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU FOR FREE!". He says 'she loves me". I said, "if she loves you why isn't she here cooking for you, and cleaning for you, and doing your laundry and taking care of you NOW!!!!
I'm so stressed out over this. Oh and he is alcoholic, to make matters worse. Dr. has declared him incapable to handle his affairs but that does no good because we are in a gray area. He still lives at home but with help of my ex SIL. If it weren't for his friends and family helping him he would be much worse.

Excellent article Patricia. Thank you for writing it. I hope it helps everyone who reads it.

Transplantwest - I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. Hopefully, she is okay. This happens more than people realize. Last year an elderly lady living alone in a nearby town lost everything she had when a 'helpful' neighbor and his wife would go in her home, help themselves to her checkbook, social security checks, bank accounts and anything of value. The lady complained to other neighbors and law enforcement, but no one took her seriously. After 3 years of taking all the poor lady had---they killed her. Please, anyone who reads this, if you know of elderly people living near you, keep an eye on them. Anything suspicious, call the police. And if they voice a concern or worry, please take them seriously. Just because a person is old, doesn't mean they are senile. Help them---someday we will all be old and need a compassionate and understanding voice.

While heartbreaking the general public will dismiss this story as they don't have this level of liquid asset. Most victims are taken advantage of in smaller "doses" if you will. And it usually STARTS small. I had it happen to me after the passing of my mother, a neighbor, tried getting my dementia father to co-sign loan papers, while getting me to loan money for the resale of used cars. A whole crew of folks moved into another family members home and lived, or crashed there when ever they needed something and nearly killed my Grandmother due to neglect. Not only do we need to watch out for ourselves, but our "older" family members.

VERY interesting... I need to make some adjustments and observations in my own life... thanks to your article! THANK YOU!

The capacity for self-delusion seems incredible in some people, regardless of how lonely they may be. How can supposedly mature people think they are actually in love -- and vice versa -- with someone they have never actually met!? Since the fake photos the scammers use are always of much younger and much more attractive people I sometimes think victims of the sweetheart scam are thinking les with their hearts than with other parts of their bodies.