It was really tough to take my mother's keys although we and her physicians new it was time. I got a call from her neighbor saying she wanted them to help her buy or rent a car. Fortunately they new the issues and put her off. I am lucky to have a sister so that we can both work together. She is now in assited living memory unit. I think she new at some level that when you can no longer drive, you loose more than just your car:(

My Dad also uses the excuse of "in case of an emergency".... he's 92 and a couple years ago got his driver's license renewed just by passing the eye exam. Dad hasn't driven in 5 years because the last two times he was out, he hit the curb and damaged a tire, twice.

But he wants to be ready "in case of emergency" I reminded him if there was such an emergency we would be dialing 911, not asking him to drive us anywhere.

Great! very helpful! Cynthia

We were dreading this as well until Mom (82) hit a neighbor's car pulling out and then drove off. Two (2) people witnessed it and when she returned and we told her, her reaction was total shock. She didn't hear a thing. So, that was the beginning of the end of her driving. Luckily, she wasn't driving all that much so we started by taking her where she needed to go. Her license expired this Dec so we were not going to renew. She took it all pretty well when we told her that it's time. Just remember that many things are taken away from them and driving really cuts back on their individuality. She eventually accepted it all. Good luck.

We were dreading this as well until Mom (82) hit a neighbor's car pulling out and then drove off. Two (20) people witnessed it and when she returned and we told her, her reaction was total shock. She didn't hear a thing. So, that was the beginning of the end of her driving. Luckily, she wasn't driving all that much so we started by taking her where she needed to go. Her license expired this Dec so we were not going to renew. She took it all pretty well when we told her that it's time. Just remember that many things are taken away from them and driving really cuts back on their individuality. She eventually accepted it all. Good luck.

I hate to say that sometimes even doctors don't have the backbone to tell the elderly to stop driving. We had to actually take the keys away and sell the car. We had many confrontations with my dad about it. But, I kept on thinking about the possible family he could kill when we already knew he couldn't drive anymore. One of the hardest things I've had to do.

Many driver's license inspectors are reluctant to pull an elderly person's license, because they have no back bone and don't want to deal with rage. So, don't rely on the facility to do anything. Hopefully, they will.

Your husband could get a state issued ID, that would work with credit card use, etc. It looks just like a driver's license. Best wishes to you, as you deal with this problem.

I haven't faced the license issue (which is tricky because the license has other purposes besides driving, such as identification, etc.) but I have dealt with the "keys and driving" issue. After he had a seizure, I told my husband that his license wasn't valid for a year, which was true. But I knew that he might not remember that. And one of the things that he still does each time he leaves the house is put his wallet and his keys in his pocket. While he seemed content to let me do the driving, I knew he would miss the key if I took it away and we would have to have this conversation (about how he can't drive) every time he went out the door.

So, I took his key to the car to the local hardware store and asked them to make me a key that looked identical but would NOT work. It was the first time they had been asked to make a non-functioning key, but, after clarification and explanation, they happily complied. I replaced his functioning key with the non-functioning one. But I left him the clicker gizmo that opens all the doors and the trunk. When we walk out to get into the car, he can still open the doors for us, and I just climb into the driver's seat. Now I don't have to worry that sometime, when I'm taking a nap, he'll be able to drive off.

Before my sister shared information, I drove to NY. Had allowed Mother to drive us to a doctor appt. It was @ that time I DECIDED enough. Them talked to sister and grilled her as to 'Why didn't you mention Mother's worrisome driving ability?' After that heated -from my end- discussion, I took all the keys & her license. Fortunately for us, Mother's neighbor was willing an qualified to drive, so the discussion was made that she -the neighbor- would assume the driving when needed. There has been some problems since, but not the worry of Mother driving. The neighbor has been added as a driver on the insurance policy (primary operator) and we maintain the vehicle. Having done this was not as hard as it was perceived to be in our case, though each family situation is different. Be kind to those that won't like it, but stand your ground, you will sleep better knowing the course of action taken was the correct thing to do.

You could let your doctor make that decision. The doctor notifies the DMV and they send an application that the person must turn in. Then there is a battery of tests, including the written one given to kids. Finally, a road test. This happened to my best friend recently, and sadly, she failed them all except the eye test. It's very hard on her, but it was necessary.

If the doctor makes the decision, you won't have to. I also don't drive because I can't turn my head properly but I was able to renew mine with only the eye test. I only keep it for identification purposes.