This article by Carol is as true today as it was when originally written over 5 years ago. I tended to think of myself as more of a visiting son when visiting my parents in the nursing home. Considering what I did in helping to take care of them when I visited (and with my father while he still lived at home), I would be considered a caregiver according to this article, but back then I felt I wasn't quite "worthy" of being called a caregiver (especially when compared to time and energy some others on this forum do...and the constant stress and sleeplessness in some cases...to care for their loved ones!).
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The thought of identifying myself as a caregiver would diminish Mom's status or dignity never entered my mind. Thank you for the insight of another perspective, Carol. Denial comes in many forms I guess.
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Dear Carol. Thanks for writing your article. I guess this situation is how you look at it. I love my mom and dad but am seeing me go down hill
I always thought I was strong. But now questioning life. I will use your article as a tool to help guide me through this and try and find a balance.
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Well said, and beautifully written. We should look at caregiving in a new light, and see it as a service to our loved ones, not as a chore or some guilt-driven sacrifice. Too many caregivers morph into martyrdom, and as a person with low self-esteem, I see this slippery slope beneath my toes! I'm caregiving for both my parents, but after six months I'm ready to call in some assistance. We should make caregivers comfortable with asking for help, because so many of us are used to giving and not taking... also, I love that you addressed the issue of "demeaning"; there is nothing demeaning about helping someone you love. All cherished relationships deserve to be "in sickness and in health, till death do us part."
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Carol, thank you. This is the best explanation and description of caregiving I've ever seen, and it's the first time I've seen the discomfort regarding a perceived loss of dignity on the receiver's part addressed. It's real. As my mother's caregiver, I often feeling uncomfortable with the term, even though it applies. I appreciate your thoughts and the reminder that respect remains.

Thanks again. I'm passing this on to others.
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