Sometimes (as a caregiver) you just can't win no matter what. You can't be responsible for their happiness (especially as a full-time job, when you have a life of your own... Who then is responsible for the caregiver's happiness?).

In my defense I became self- righteous. We feel we're doing it all but what's needed most is lots of communication. Understanding each other as we both grow in this new relationship. Sometimes the routine ( here's this here's that.) overshadows the tender moments both need. Your in charge, make a hug kiss or smile the starting point. You'll like you better.

My mother sleeps a LOT. I find her bad mood is directly tied to how much she forces herself to sleep (it's her answer to her severe depression).

Just my experience!

Exactly correct

Sometimes negative statements and complaining can just be an elder's way of communicating. They want to talk, but their current experiences are limited. So they talk about what they know -- pains, sickness, loss. It can get mighty depressing to listen to. It helps to think of it as them telling us how their day was. No school, no work, only home life, medication, and discomfort. It can help if you can get them to take a tour back to an earlier time. We may have heard the stories a million times, but they are better than listening to negative remarks.