I totally agree with the benefits of writing, especially when under stress or duress, such as being a caregiver. I wrote a book about my husband and I taking care of my mom with Alzheimer's called, "My Mother has Alzheimer's and My Dog has Tapeworms: A Caregiver's Tale." I didn't keep a journal or diary per se, but if something funny happened, I'd jot it down. Writing a book helps readers and writers alike.
Lately I have written a few emails I was reluctant to send. While I felt the need to get it all out, I didn't want to burden a good friend with all my angst. I had saved a few of my previous ramblings on my computer so I decided to gather them all into one document, hmmm it is starting to look surprisingly like a journal to me! LOL
When I was a young teen in NJ my aunt gave me a 5 yr diary for my birthday - I was THRILLED :) wrote mundane stuff (went to school, etc.) but it was so cool because I even wrote when late ex-President Nixon resigned!!! I wrote EVERYTHING in that diary. After we moved to FL I got another 5 yr diary but didn't write as much then stopped altogether. Now I write about EACH visit w/mom because I realize it's a permanent record of our time together. Along w/Gail (Nurse Advocate) notes I have a written record of mom's last couple of yrs with me. My counselor told me to not just write about the visit but also my feelings about the visit so I do that too. I'm finding it to be a very big help to me to get my feelings out on paper.
{{Laughing}} Thank you for this article! OMGoodness. I Finally gave in to seeking therapy about 3 weeks ago because I am no longer happy with the status quo of my life. One of my very first assignment was to Journal. I am so lost in what she meant by that. She gave examples but...I thought I understood..... I rarely look at the articles on the Home Page. Today, I felt this urge to look at some of the articles. Thanks. NOW I know what I'm suppose to do in my journal: emotions, thoughts, feelings of the past, of today and of our future....Well, maybe not the future. That just seems soooo far away...Now I can seriously start journaling instead of leaving it blank these past few days.
My wife was diagnosed with CBD in December of 2003 so I have just completed my 8th year as a caregiver. About the 2nd year I went back and created notes from memory for the first couple years and have kept up with it ever since.
It is more a series of notes than it is a journal. Last year I was able to get my wife involved in a research program and they were able to use some of the notes in the project. That was my intention. The research director told me at the time he wished I would have included more of my feelings in the notes, but I had been trying to keep it more in 3rd person and keeping my thoughts out of it. Since then I have added a few more of my own feelings but it is difficult.
I asked the neurologist if she would like to review them at one of our appointments and she told me she would not have time and she probably could not do anything more for us anyway.
I talked to our GP and instead of doing a yearly checkup we go in on a quarterly basis. I recap all the notes and drop them off for the doctor a week or so before the appointment so she has time to look over them. Sometimes she gets a chuckle out of them, sometimes she sees something I should not be doing, and I always include questions that have come up during the quarter with it.
About 4 years ago I became convinced that diet was playing a big part in the progression of the disorder. By keeping good notes, I finally determined the two biggest things were milk and soy products. I figured out the milk right away, just figured out the soy in the last couple months. It is very difficult to find something when you don't exactly know what you are looking for.
We will be going in for the next doctor's appointment in about 3 weeks. I feel my wife is doing as good or better now than she has done for about the past year. She has better color, she is eating better, her bowel movements are much better, her incontinence has improved, she is doing little things she was not doing before like helping herself eat, coming in to sit down at the table instead of having to go get her, and I think she has started gaining weight again.
My notes are still mostly a fact sheet of diet, activity, etc., but I do try to put a little bit of my own thoughts down once in a while. I did add another food to her diet for lunch today and by keeping notes for the rest of the day I will know if that is something I can keep on giving her from now on.
I do ramble at times. I think it is a result of dealing with the CBD.
Cricket...I would do a similar thing...and go outside on the porch and talk to the Lord. I was the only thing that got me thru the hard days. You have to love and be in touch with yourself and your inner feelings in order to help others...God Bless you.
Keeping a journal is a great tool for me. Many times while I'm writing my words begin to flow freely and my feelings are released and I feel so much better. Many times I've literally had to lock the door to have some alone time to write and keep from being interrupted and even then there have been times when I can't even hear my own thoughts because of the distractions and overwhelming situations that occur due to caregiving.
When I am feeling like there is no peace around me in the house with caring for the one I love I will go out to my car at night so no one can see me and I just begin to talk out loud to God, at first it feels really weird and must seem like I am crazy lol, however once I just make myself start talking, even if it's just rambling at first, after a few minutes the words begin to flow and the pouring out of my feelings start to let loose. In this situation once the flood gates are opened feelings begin to come out of me that I wasn't even aware of and I am enlightened. I feel the divine spirit of God helping me in this situation and the affects are as if my grief, worries, fears, guilt, all of these feelings are poured out of me and an Angel of God picks them up and helps me to carry the burdens. It literally makes my soul feel lighter on so many levels. To get this kind of help the questions I pray about are these;
Please help me father to see this person and this situation and everything about it differently, help me to get a new perspective on both myself and this person and situation.
Once I see where my thinking is off or more specifically what situation that has come up or out as a result of caregiving then I search for a deeper understanding and for a way to change my perspective by listening to self help audiobooks or reading books that are on the area I need to understand. I find that many times the answers will come to me while I am talking to God or later when I am taking in knowledge.
I am sharing this experience with the intention of helping others here who like me might need to take journaling to the next step.
I havent kept a journal about my experiences , but after searching for answers to my questions. I came acroos this site. I have been a care giver for many family members and many of them got better and are able to do things for themselves, but now I am with my grandmother. she fractured her femur over six months ago and was in a rehab place for two months and I have been here with her since with my son and animals. she is able to walk and do many things for herself but cant do the things she needs to live alone. the doctor ordered her to walk everyday and to do it often to reverse her osteoparosis. she wont believe that she needs to move... the only time she gets up is when I tell her to. otherwise she wants to lay down.. is there anyone that would have a suggestion that would help her understand the importance on moving herself more and to feel good that she still can do things......
I would not say I kept a journal ...but I started a small secret group on Facebook with a handful of caregivers going thru the same thing. Over the past year we cried, vented, shared and consoled each other and yes sometimes laughed. The 5 ladies were my rock thru this journey because they were on the same path. I can look back on those threads and see how similar yet different this Alzheimer road was. Mom passed away last week peacefully and with dignity in her own bed at home and I am comforted by that. My prayers are with all who take on this monster task with such love.
Being a caregiver with scant family support, this simple tool would be very useful for me to keep things from becoming pent up inside and help me sort the myriad issues. At the very least, it will give me something to find some humor in when I read back on it later.
I have been keeping a "Caregiver's Journal" since Feb. 2007. I do not write regularly, but I feel it has been very helpful. Sometimes just writing something helps to clear it out of my mind. when it's on paper I don't have to "worry" about it any more. And, I find it's useful, on occasion, to reread what has gone before. It helps to realize how far we have come.
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Journaling for Caregivers: Rediscover Yourself and Reclaim Your Life
It is more a series of notes than it is a journal. Last year I was able to get my wife involved in a research program and they were able to use some of the notes in the project. That was my intention. The research director told me at the time he wished I would have included more of my feelings in the notes, but I had been trying to keep it more in 3rd person and keeping my thoughts out of it. Since then I have added a few more of my own feelings but it is difficult.
I asked the neurologist if she would like to review them at one of our appointments and she told me she would not have time and she probably could not do anything more for us anyway.
I talked to our GP and instead of doing a yearly checkup we go in on a quarterly basis. I recap all the notes and drop them off for the doctor a week or so before the appointment so she has time to look over them. Sometimes she gets a chuckle out of them, sometimes she sees something I should not be doing, and I always include questions that have come up during the quarter with it.
About 4 years ago I became convinced that diet was playing a big part in the progression of the disorder. By keeping good notes, I finally determined the two biggest things were milk and soy products. I figured out the milk right away, just figured out the soy in the last couple months. It is very difficult to find something when you don't exactly know what you are looking for.
We will be going in for the next doctor's appointment in about 3 weeks. I feel my wife is doing as good or better now than she has done for about the past year. She has better color, she is eating better, her bowel movements are much better, her incontinence has improved, she is doing little things she was not doing before like helping herself eat, coming in to sit down at the table instead of having to go get her, and I think she has started gaining weight again.
My notes are still mostly a fact sheet of diet, activity, etc., but I do try to put a little bit of my own thoughts down once in a while. I did add another food to her diet for lunch today and by keeping notes for the rest of the day I will know if that is something I can keep on giving her from now on.
I do ramble at times. I think it is a result of dealing with the CBD.
When I am feeling like there is no peace around me in the house with caring for the one I love I will go out to my car at night so no one can see me and I just begin to talk out loud to God, at first it feels really weird and must seem like I am crazy lol, however once I just make myself start talking, even if it's just rambling at first, after a few minutes the words begin to flow and the pouring out of my feelings start to let loose. In this situation once the flood gates are opened feelings begin to come out of me that I wasn't even aware of and I am enlightened. I feel the divine spirit of God helping me in this situation and the affects are as if my grief, worries, fears, guilt, all of these feelings are poured out of me and an Angel of God picks them up and helps me to carry the burdens. It literally makes my soul feel lighter on so many levels. To get this kind of help the questions I pray about are these;
Please help me father to see this person and this situation and everything about it differently, help me to get a new perspective on both myself and this person and situation.
Once I see where my thinking is off or more specifically what situation that has come up or out as a result of caregiving then I search for a deeper understanding and for a way to change my perspective by listening to self help audiobooks or reading books that are on the area I need to understand. I find that many times the answers will come to me while I am talking to God or later when I am taking in knowledge.
I am sharing this experience with the intention of helping others here who like me might need to take journaling to the next step.
Cricket