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Sick with Worry: How Thoughts Affect Your Health


What happens is that we are usually forced into a job where we have had zero to very little training, and is expected to know what to do from day one. At least with a job we really dislike we can quit, but it's not that easy when it comes to caring for aging parents or a spouse. Oh how I wished I would have found this Aging Care website 7 years ago, instead of 2 years ago. I didn't know I could set boundaries.

And many of us are senior citizens ourselves with our own age decline, aches and pains. Yet we are expected to do the same work as someone half our age. Like who thought this was a good idea? Especially with modern science where people can now live into their 100's, thus that means their grown child who is 80 is doing the caregiving. Or a grandchild who is 60 is caring for parents AND grandparents.

A few years ago I developed breast cancer which really terrified me... there were no family markers so this came out of the blue... yep, it was from stress. A couple months ago I crashed and burned physically and emotionally from all the stress of the past 7 years.

Being an only child with no children, there wasn't anyone I could past the baton onto to help me. And my parents refused big time any caregivers or cleaning crews to help out. My folks [mid-to-late 90's] still lived in their single family home which had a lot of stairs. And I still lived in my own house. Every time the phone rang I went into sheer panic when I saw their Caller ID, who fell now? After awhile, this stress will do a lot of damage.

Of what they have done to us It has eaten a hole into my mind which screams out for revenge. They now wait using the shield of government to deny us benefits and compensation. What the Navy, Marines Corps, and the government has done, Should be criminal. I am tortured daily with nightmares, sleep depravity, And so many medical issues that I am told I've the medical level of a man in his late 70s. I want revenge. I want the people who put this in the dark, Arrested and given to the vets for real justice.

I am an only child so I have not siblings to help. So far I have been able to work and I will not quit my job, it's all I have to keep me off the streets. My mother has dementia and is in poor health so I am very anxious. I take her temp and other vitals continuously. I have no money for a nursing home. My mom has a pension and social security so she doesn't qualify for assistance. Hospice has been suggested but that is just letting your parent lay there and die in "comfort" and you have to sit there and watch. The nurse and the aids won't be there to get her up in the morning, put her to bed at night or attempt to feed her so what good are they. The main stress is still on me. I feel hopeless.

Having cared for both my parents till there passing for over ten years, I decided to give up my life to do this because I loved them so much and didn't trust any of the care home systems that were available. Right move too it turned out to be with all the care home new and awful stuff going on! My father transferred the tenancy of the council house to me so I could stay with mum until her end and so give me a housing support afterward. (well that's what I thought)
This was a wonderful relief thinking I wouldn't have any issues with housing for the rest of my days as I too have serious health problems with my heart and Oesophagus. Mum and dad now passed I downsized from the 3 bed family home for over 50 years to a 2 bed housing association with a tenancy swap as the house was just too big for me to manage and went back to try some form of work as a builder.. Now thank you to the Tory government at 52 years of age I have never been so stressed, worried and am struggling with anxiety attacks because of the changes they have implicated to a single man in social housing, chances are I will have to give up this house now at some point in the future because of the failed governments... my story runs deep and I will probably do something stupid if they take it away, I am angry, feel cheated, frustrated and have no support from any system not even a carers society, it seems as though I am getting kicked whilst I'm down and grieving.
I am sure this will shorten my life more so because of these problems which are out of my control, it just adds pressure, the job I do is manual and retirement age will change to 70 (if I make it that far) This has been obviously thought of by a government office worker!
Well that's my moans and groans and thank you for reading this article, I wish someone would print it in a national newspaper as I'm sure there are many like me.

The weight is much heavier and affects your health when the personalities of the one you are caring for and the personalities of siblings go against all you are doing (especially, when it's at your home and you giving up so much). I've painted myself into a corner and now have all the horrible memories of this continued experience and have lost anything that used to resemble a 'family'. Fun how I am the only one who feels the 'responsibity' and will have to look back at this and feel the continued pain associated with this Phase' in my life that has caused me to be so depressed (ands yes... I have gone to counsellors, etc but it doesn't take the pain away... And I found them useless). I also have issues associated with this stress now while I have no 'family' member that cares.

Because of 15-25 hrs per week of caregiving duties for my mom, I just have no time nor energy for getting much-needed exercise. I am now about 60 pounds overweight. My doctor says I should get a personal trainer and learn how to lift weights at my home (don't try to join a gym, no time for that!). The stinky thing is, 2 of my siblings regularly get tons of work out time, because they don't have to take care of mom. Guess who will live longer?

I totally agree. Dealing with my dementia parents over the last fifteen years has resulted in my experiencing every single ailment on that list (except for the blood sugar level problems.) I've often said that they are killing me and I wasn't joking or exaggerating.

Even if your love one is in a long term care facility there still is a lot of stress dealing with someone who has alzheimers. I am an only child who lives 200 miles from my mother. I lived where I am for 42 years so I have a lot of supportive friends. My mother refuses to move closer to me. She frequently tells me she wants me to "slip by" to see her. I routinely go to see her once month and sometimes more often to attend meetings with regard to her care. She gets very upset when I don't come when she wants me to. The constant worry about this and driving in bad weather conditions is taking a toll on my health. I have high blood pressure and I have recently learned that my high bp is damaging my kidneys.

Yes, it is true. Only caregivers understand what we are through. I'm Mom's caregiver. Even I lived in a senior living which they can take care of Mom when I'm out, she gets upset and mad with me; like today I was 3 hrs helping my daughter at the dr & I told her before living. She just want me to be at her side & do nothing else. Sometimes I feel like crazy. Only Gods & friends like you make me feel better. Yes, I have siblings, but no help to stay with her. Anyway, I chose to do this & with God help I'll do untill the end....


Caregiver to my husband with dementia. My mom moved in with us before he was diagnosed. Since his diagnosis she has been a real pain in the butt. Constantly berating me for all the care I give to my husband. She hardly speaks to him and when she does she is not kind. He's easy to take care of and I feel good about our relationship. It's my mom's presence that raises my stress level. The other day I was so angry when I left the house my heart was pounding almost out of my chest because of her callous and unempathetic attitude toward my husband. She's going to be responsible for making me ill if I don't find some resolve to relationship with her.