Your dad does not sound competent, and thus as his POA, you are going to have to make those arrangements. As his POA, you can take your sibling to court for stealing your dad's truck and for the money your sibling stole.

My dad recently was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer. He is 81 and I am his oldest son . I have 4 other younger adult siblings. Up until two months ago, one my younger siblings was his caregiver until recently that she kicked him out and my wife and I picked him up. I come to find out that my sibling stole his truck and $10,000.00 cash. I got a POA, but I am now having a problem with him making decisions such as funeral arrangements. He is very hard to speak in regards to making rational decisions. I need some suggestions please..Thank you

I paid an attorney quite a bit of money for a retainer for quardianship application for mom, they did nothing. It's a traumatic experience for all family members and leaves you broke.

You can consult with your lawyer to solve the problem of guardian ship. And after getting the guardianship admit the parents in old age assisted home for better nursing car.

What happens (already have POA)and i get guardianship but dont tell siblings?
they don't find the time to visit or help out with his care,

my father was moved into a nursing home five months ago. The situation now is due to a false accusation that my father was slapped by my mother. The adult protective services wants to assign him a Guardian. This would possibly infringe on his rights. Is it possible to limit the control of the guardian in this case? How would I go about it?

I wish I could give you some advice but 4000 later and two attorneys, they did exactly the same thing.......my Mom took my Dad who had dementia diagnosis and had my husbands dpoa revoked and put her on - she is the one who originally kicked Dad out of house - Dad also now in nursing home and just in case, if they try to bar you from visitation as they did to me, you have to call the owner of the nursing home and read them your rights under the 1987 OBRA legislation if they are accepting medicare......the attorneys do NOT want to go to court even if you tell them there is no point in negotiating ....they do it anyway and then charge you for it - they charge you 20.00 for a 5 minute phone call for heavens sake..........we did find one attorney who said he would have no problem in getting my mother off of Dad's care completely.....for 25,000 so we are dealing the best we can.......the poor man can't even hear and she took away his hearing aids but yet left a note on the wall for the nurses to put them in.........I hate to say it but I think you are hitting the same brick walls we did as Dad also wanted to go home under VA care.......Mom won't take him and we are unable to do anything.........I really feel for you.............my sister was after the same thing as your brother (mom has some dementia) and she got what she was after..........longterm care ombudsman are useless as well and be careful of your brother in case he tries to report you to DCF like my sister did.......then they investigate you..........

my brother tricked my parents into signing P.O.A. over to him and pretty much bullied them into making a new will giving him control over everything.dads a heart patient and mom has slight dementia.he has managed to get them put into a nursing home.my sister and I are in court trying to get guardianship which my brother also got(a temporary guardian).we have a lawyer that seems to be just setting back and initiating nothing while my brother is using stall tactics to delay a decision in this matter.mom and dad have the means to have 24/7 homecare.all brother wants is all their assets.we are trying to do everything legally but it seems noone is listening to us.an Ad Litem is also involved but refuses to return calls.my parents only wish is to pass at home.we want nothing but this to be granted but it seems we are just hitting brick walls at every turn.any advice from anyone?

If your parent appoint a person whom you do not know POA what can you do to decide the medical decision when this POA does not keep tabs on your parents care. So far my parent has lost both his feet and is dying. The POA does not keep us inform of the patient condition or the POA will change the patient rest home without telling us where the patient is . Concern

I have 80 yr old mom w/advanced Parkinson's, dementia, has suffered at least two significant strokes, macular degeneration, cataracts have left her with only scant vision, mobility totally dependent on motorized wheel chair, cannot bathe without someone performing that, must have assistance to use toilet, getting out of bed. She is at times alert mentally, but more and more that is going. My sister has POA, I am trying to get mom here to Texas where there are more benefits for helping her with either in home care or nursing home. My family is totally willing to take on the responsibility and with the added state assistance she would be well taken care of. California where she lives, well we all know how they are killing all sources of "any" help for "any one". Problem is, Mom is one moment wanting to come here, next moment she doesn't, she cannot make the decision. Both my sister and I KNOW that it is best for her to come here. She cannot be left alone. Is it permissible for us to override mom and move her regardless?

I have POA over everything, but she is slipping and I need to have guardianship so I can control what she is spending or giving away. She was ready for me to take control until her attorney drew up a paper and had her sigh it, making himself the one that would decide not a doctor??if I could be guardian she told him to sign because I was doing everything anyway and she just didn't want to anything any more for me to take of her like my father did. Well he scared her and said she could not ever have a say in her life again(so not true) and that is where I am.

horrible experience - Dad alchoholic w senile dementia but was functioal - had two equal dpoa's Mom and my husband - we had Dad all set up finally in a 5 star asst living and had applied for his va benefits..........mom has fight with my husband - (Dad had been found inomptent by state prosecutor in a dui case andd state of Fl dropped charges finding the comptency exam given by the expert indicated he would nt regain competeency - this was on feb 2) - Feb 15, Mom takes Dad to sis's dui attny who does a revocation - i emal to the attny that he jst did a revocation on someone who had been deemed incompetent - 10 days after the revocation, he has a mini mental eval done on Dad by sis's alchohol counselor who uses her husbands phyc letter head but goofs and says ws examined in Clearwater and the phyc office in St Petersburg - we get one attorney and ask him to have the revocation re instated - instead he files guardianshp and comes out on same day, mom had Dad sign a health surogate form naming sis's husband which then trumped out Dad's living will which named my husband - we fired the attny - got new one but same day got new one, we get petition from the dui attny (who has no business handling guardianship anyway - if you look at web site all he states is duis and sealings) but sis has money - petitiion says now Mom is filing for guardianship - new attny says well now that she hs done that, we can't fight for re instatement of the dpoa as the guardianship trumps the dpoa so now we have a guardianship battle going on - my step daughter is a nurse who says she has no doubt in the end we would prevail but heaven knows how many thousands of dollars later..........our attny is going to approach opposing council to see how reacts with idea of court appt guardian but I already told attny Mom will not accept - she said well then she would try for ok mom can have guardianship but the health surrogate has to go and shoud mom die first, then we petetion again for guardianship..........sis's husband won't care and once mom is dead and sis has gotten the house that hs been promised to me for 16 yrs, she won't give a hoot eithr..........the sad part is that all be it Dad had bad short term memory and was grumpy, he could walk, read, watch tv, go out to dinner, etc - less than 3 wks under mom's care, massive stroke and is back to an infantile status with pureed foods, diapers, can't see or comprehend tv - slight movement only in right hand...........nursing home not even up to standards.....mom and sis don't really care - this was a power play on both their parts - they" could give a hoot less if Dad lives or dies - I was always the daughter closest to him and look like him............very tragic - it is not like Dad hs any money - he does not........only his ss and medicaid which go to nursing home.........and all the attnys care about is the money route..........and the dui attny I have reported to the fl bar and hope the bastard gets kicked out.........10 days after he did the revocation does a mini mental exam of which dad got 29 out of 30 - this is a 10 minute test used often to determine dementia - seeing he had already dne the revocation, did not even matter but this dui attny called it a competency test - and to top it off they consider a 25 normal so why the hell then was dad even in an asst living??????????

what must be done to release one person with power of attorney to anouther person who gets guardianship? Shouold the released person get some sort of copy from the person with guardianship?

Myladyalexis, the answer to your question about notifying your siblings of your seeking guardianship is Yes. You have to notify siblings of this. They can contest your guardianship and drag this out. Also it can cost alot of money when this happens. So I would get their blessing and then go forward. Good Luck and seek the advice of an attorney.

Can someone get guardianship of her elderly father from her stepmother who is no longer competent enough to take care of even herself? The stepmother has Power of Attorney but has mild dementia and is not capable of taking care of the father who also has severe dementia.

If I apply for guardianship of my elderly mother while she is in a special care facility, do I have to inform my siblings?

My mother is having mental issues which is causing her to make poor decissions, She believes she is fine. How would I get this if she gives me no cooperation.

When dealing with my mom- she was already so far into the dementia, I couldn't get the POA, as she has to give that power to me. I had to hire an attorney, (cost 1,500.) in the state of Oklahoma. She was found incompetent by a judge in family court, as I provided documentation from her attending physician- plus, I took her into the courtroom with me, and the judge could see for herself how far gone my mom was. The judged ruled that she found my mom was indeed incapable of making ANY decisions on her own. Thus, giving me the guardianship over my mom. Because I felt compelled to place her in a nursing home in the state of Arkansas(to keep her geographically close to her companion of 6 yrs)- I had to name him as the co-guardian- seems the person being under somebody's guardianship has to live in the same state and county UNLESS there is a co-guardian that lives in that state the nursing home is in. I named her companion as co-guardian so to leave her closer to him in proximity, made more sense that I drive the 2 and a half hr drive myself to see her than to make this 80 yr old man do it, out of concern for his safety, his finances, and just trying to make things easier for him. He had taken care of my mother in his home for close to a year before I went to court and made it possible to move her residence to make it easier for him, all he had to do was visit her-and he did everyday. In the meantime, times got hard for me, finances were affected, my husband had a heart attack, and I couldn't make the trip to visit mom as often as I liked- decided to move her closer to me- but here's the catch- I CANNOT move my mom's place of residence without the co-guardian's signature and approval!!! No blood relation, but when I mentioned it to him, he said, "Over my dead body"- he doesn't care that this is MY mom, that I can't afford the gas to drive back and forth to see her as often as I should or would like, he forgot the whole reason I put her there in the first place. If I had my do-overs, I would never have named him co- and would NEVER have placed my mom in Arkansas to make it convenient for him to visit her. I CAN go back to my attorney used in the first place, pay another1,500.00- to file against him and prove that since he not blood relative, and this is a hardship for me- could take it to court, and have him removed as the co-guardian. I can't afford it, and his health is bad- he probably doesn't have but this year also. I hate to do it to this old man. I really do care for the guy,and appreciate all he's done, and I know he genuinely loves my mom- my only thing is that if my mom wasn't there, this man would have nothing and nobody. That breaks my heart. My mom doesn't know the length of time between visits, and may not know I'm there- but I still have my husband, children and grandchildren to fill my days. This man never had any kids, no grandkids, and the only blood family he has is down in Alabama. Even as upset as I have been with him, still can't find it in my heart to do it. Just saying, be clear on the state's rules and regulations with the guardian and co-guardianship should you ever consider naming one.

My grandfather is 85 years old and has dementia. He has been married for ten years now to my step grandmother. She recently fell and broke her pelvic bone. During that time my grandfather went and stayed with one of her children. With his dementia he has some issues, feeding, using the restroom, and with wondering. The daughter called my father, who is his only child, and asked us to come get him. This was a few days after she had fallen. We had no idea this was going on. We are now trying to get my grandfather help and get him into an assisted living facility. He needs 24/7 care that my family nor his wifes family can provide, but we are running into issues. His wifes children will no let us speak to her or let us have any information as far as my grandfathers financials and other things, which the facility needs so we can go forth with placement. We only have his best interest in mind and we want him to be safe. With them still being married, and us not being able to speak to her to get anything resolved, we are stuck. Is it too late to do a durable POA? This is a very tough situation for my family right now. We didn't plan for any of this, which is our fault, but when he remarried after my grandmothers death, there really wasn't much we could do. They have taken over anything. I hope someone can give me some advice on where to go from here. My dad feels like his hands are tied. It's his father, and there is nothing he can do legally because of them.

As Power of Attorney for finances and a Power of Attorney for Health care for my mother for many years. When my husband and I relocated to another state. I informed my two siblings I would be relocating our mother with us just as soon as we were settled. My siblings never helped with my mother's care and made excuses when I ask for help with her. My experience was they hired an attorney and filed temporary Guardianship. The Judge denied the sibling Guardianship. The attorneys and siblings carry this out for a year. This cost my mother alot of money. I also had to hire representation. I think this is a terrible scam of the legal system for a elderly person to experience.

go thru.

My mother has been diagnosed with Dementia. She is combative and now in a nursing home. My sister and I have POA and now I must obtain Guardianship because my mother claimed my sister hit her. Because she is on medicaid, when she was admitted to the hospital, she told the social worker my sister hit her. The court appoint a conservator who upon interviewing my sister state in her report that none of my mom's children should have fiduciary over my mom. The person made the determination with talking to me or my brothers. I have hire and attorney to do a rebuttal and schedule a court date. My plan is to move my mom to the state where I live. My sister is very stressed because not of the allegations are true. What are my chances of being able to obtain guardianship of my mom. My sister and brother are fine with me doing this. I do not want the state taking control of my mom and making medical or any other decision for her. That, in my opinion is my responsibility.

last sept my mom fell & went to hospital,I had been taking care of all her bills,shopping,etc for several yrs,had talked to her Dr several times as she was geting more * more confused,she had to go to a nursing home as she has dementia,because they said she was incompetent to give me poa I had to go through the process of becoming guardian,it has been a long struggle & a nightmare,no one to help me,in order for her to get medicaid,had to turn all her income over to the nh & all insurance over to funeral home,she is still there but getting worsenow I get a letter saying I didnt file accounting with the court & fiduciary commssioner,trying to find some help,I just want my mom to be taken care of,it is so difficult...

I am my mother's medical dpoa. My brother has taken her from the hospital and into his home where she has remained for several days. Does my brother have any legal right to keep my mother from leaving his home by way of a person trespassing on his property to pick her up for the day? I need this question answered asap as this will be ocurring tomorrow.

I have a POA for my grandmother and I am also her agent on her Advanced Directive. I would like to obtain legal guardianship of her so I know she will get the best care. What's the best way to do so? I cannot afford an attorney.

When someone was done told they couldnt get poa of patient because of stroke and the state of mind he is in but somehow they got one fixed how do u go about getting that stopped.This patients wife wasnt even able to cause his state of mind after fifty yrs of marrige.Also they are abusing it at that.They have sold several cars, a home,and other anyway to get a dollar.This person doesnt even take care of the patients bills instead me and his wife does,nor does he spend one dollar of the money he got by selling patients stuff on the patient,instead he keeps it and still trying to sell more.He said his mom couldnt live by herself n if she did then he force her to nursing home as well.So she lives with me and has almost a yr,but he moved in her home forcing her to still pay the bills there even though she dont live there.There is lots more but i need help to stop his son from doing all this and he done it all for money.The minute his dad got put in nursing home,he had all his bills put in patients name therefore his mother is paying all his bills and he is still selling all he can.please let me know what to do

stopelderabusen, that is a very good comment and what I have read before. All I want is my Mom to put me on her POA's as an alternate, just in case my brother dies. She won't do it and he just says "you'll have to get guardianship". I want to scream. I am so mad I have stopped talking to Mom and told my brother under no circumstances would I go to court to get guardianship. Then the courts will have to appoint someone who will take alot of Mom's money. Still neither Mom or my brother budge. He doesn't care and she is paranoid and has some personality disorder. I give up. Nothing I can do. But I be darned if I am going to be pushed into the guardianship mess.

Don't Do It !!! The Guardianship System, once you and your loved one gets sucked in, can and will deplete your loved one's estate especially if a stranger guardian is appointed. It is very easy for them to find you unsuitable as a guardian and you will not have a day in court to defend the allegations from many of the cases we have seen. It is and extremely expensive legal process that has left many eldery and their families destitute, has resulted in an elderly person being abused and the family having no power to intervene because there is a guardian, and it seems the families have no option but to hire an attorney and go to the guardianship court if things go wrong. In the meantime the guardian has so much power that they can even deny the troublesome or interfering family member the right to visit their own loved one.

BTW: Calimelshmaul, her monthly SS check and pension are only $2,700.00. She pays out over $7,500.00 a month easily, so if you think $250,000.00 will last for years, think again. Do the math. It has been over a month, waiting to liquidate an annuity. WELLS FARGO is jerking her around and not releasing it. IT IS CRAZY. It is her money and she needs it to live on. I HATE WELLS FARGO. DO NOT USE THEM ANYONE. Please trust me on this issue. 6 weeks later and still no annuity has gone into her credit union account, so I can pay the bills!
TRANSAMERICA long term care benefit turned out to be a rip-off. I am not going to tell her this or she will want the care givers gone even more. My sister has convinced her that she needs the money more that paying for care for her OWN mother. TRANSAMERICA use to give her $2,100.00 a month, suddenly it is only $1,600.00 and will keep dropping as long as she needs care. She has over $350,000.00 left in long term benefit money. I am turning them into the BANKING COMMISSIONER. I called the Congressman in her town already. I am telling you, once you get sick (in her case dementia) everyone wants a piece of whatever is there. PROBATE, nephews, my very greedy sister, attorneys FEES of over $20,000.00 just from 2010-now. They are VULTURES preying on the elderly. She has no idea how lucky she is to have a pit bull of a daughter fighting for her. I call TRANSAMERICA 3-4 times a month to argue over why she has not been paid her benefit. I am sick of it!

I was NOT POA when my sister was gettting the cash. My cousins were allowing this and funny they never submitted any audit ever. Before 2009, my mother was just giving it all away, like she as a ROCKEFELLER. She "felt sorry for my sister because she is not married, and has no friends". So I guess in her mind, she took responsibility for her pathetic life. Your attitude is what gets you happiness, not a check from mom.
I was never gifted anything and I am glad. If the state ever goes back in time, I will not show up as being a vulture.
The money she has left is going to be for her care, which is something my greedy sister is not wrapping her head around. She wants what she has been use to. No reason here. I am so frugal with her money, but the live in care is $6,000.00 a month, not counting food, electricity, cable, taxes, AARP deduction.
I was told by atttorneys that: She has enough for 3-5 years, then the house will be sold, she will be denied TITLE 19 initially, but eventually they will have to give it to her.

Are you saying that your mother was incompetent - totally out of it - for the whole 10 years? Neither your mother nor you noticed the misssing $22,000 every year?

If the gifting stops now, why can't your mother last 5 years on the $250,000 you said she has left? Especially considering there must be some kind of other income as well.