Hello, I've been taking by care of my father who is 82 years old. He's permenantly disabled. He receives retirement and has Medicare. I quit my job of 8 years to care for him. How can I find out if I'm eligible for benefits.
What about car usage? We've been having a lot of financial and car problems. We've only had one car for over a year and we have to spread that one car over 4 people -- I have to use it to help my mother and do her driving and my husband has to do the same with his father. A couple of months ago we had to buy another (small, used) car in an emergency situation, to replace our 14 yr. old car that was in bad shape. (My husband had been using that car to help his father and do his driving for almost 10 yrs.) We had to cash in some retirement money for the down payment and had to take out a loan for the rest.
While my mother has her car sitting in her driveway doing nothing. She won't expect my siblings and their families, with all of their cars, to do any of her driving, and they don't. She won't use her community's shuttle bus or take a cab or use grocery delivery service. I keep reminding her that we only have one car, but she's dismissive, as usual. She's said that if I don't take her to her doctors' appointments, she doesn't have any way of getting there. What if I have car problems or just don't have use of a car -- she won't be able to get to the doctor?
My father-in-law gave my sister-in-law his car for free, because they didn't think she should have to scrape up her own money and take out a loan to buy her own car (the way we had to). I think whoever the parent gives their car to, should be the one who has to do the parent's driving. But that's not how it works with my in-laws. Sister-in-law gets the free car and my husband is expected to do their father's driving with our only car, with the monthly loan payments.
bluesgirl53, the majority of grown children do not get paid for caring for their parent unless the parent can pay you directly from their own retirement fund. You would need to set up an employment contract stating how many hours per week you will work, what are your duties, and the hourly rate decided between you and your Mom... you would be responsible for payroll taxes.
To get paid going back ten years, that depends if your mother can afford to pay you for the past ten years.
If your mother is on Medicaid, check with your State Medicaid office to see if your State has any type of caregiver payment program... not many States do... if they do, chances are it would be minimum wage at a few hours per week. And no, you would not be paid for the past 10 years.
i have took care of my two elderly parents for two years.i'm in need of money to get help with them. i need to take time for me too. does anyone know how to get help?
My mom just turned 89. She is in pretty good health for her age, but has trouble walking and uses a walker and is fairly frail. She worked for a government job for 30+ years and was smart enough to take out a long-term care plan, which along with her SS and pension, has been able to keep her in a very nice assisted living center. However, that money is going to be running out in less than a year. We are trying to get VA benefits from my deceased father, but so far it does not look hopeful. I work at home for my job, telecommuting, so I am home all day but cannot provide full time care for her during the day, and my husband is on the road as a trucker so he is not available except one week a month. she may be coming to live with us when her money runs out and if that is the case I would probably have to hire a home caregiver during the day while I work. She still has her SSI and her pension, but I heard there are some programs that can provide aid for caregivers. Does anyone know how to get information on some of these financial aid programs. Also has anyone had experience with home caregivers, and are they for the most part trustworthy, and provide a good service. Any help someone can give me would be greatly appreciated.
Littlehelper, if your mother is self-pay and has sufficient funds to pay you, she certainly can. I suggest a personal care contract spelling out the details, especially if there are siblings or others involved who might question what is happening to Mom's money.
If she is there on Medicaid, I doubt there are programs to pay you. The medicaid waiver program is intended to extend people's stay at home.
I agree with you that family can still provide care and have expenses when the loved one is in a care center. My 3 sisters and I visit Mom at least once a week each, and do little things for her. But we see residents who have no family and who go months between visitors. So Medicaid is correct. People in a nursing home can get by without outside help. The ones who have it, though, are the fortunate ones!
I've been given conflicting info on getting reimbursed for Mom's errands, laundry care and time I spend on her financial needs like paying her bills and maintaining her checkbook. I live in Connecticut. Mom is in a local nursing facility but there are still needs I must fill. Can I log hours spent on my mother's needs and get paid or not?
I have moved in with my mother to care for her. I have moved out of state to Florida and am unable to get a job right now. I am doing what I can via private contracts but that isn't meeting the needs. Are their options. She is on Medicare but doesn't have much else.
Has anyone in CT been trying to apply for T19 for their parent??? Ive been in the process for months and let me tell you !!! they want so much information.... Ive been managing but... Im suppose to keep a time sheet for everything I do all day!!!!!!! whether its a homemaker service... medical.. or financial. All 3 are at different rates of pay...... the last thing I want to do at night is fill out a time sheet... and I going to get reimbursed by the state??? for keeping her out of the nursing home????? cause right now ... I have no income and my check book is tapped out !!!!! Im a single mom as well.. so how this is all happening .. I haven't a clue.. can you say STRESS????????
Each and every day most people are faced with an increasing need to manage the health and day-to-day affairs of their aging parents. This above information is quite helpful for those who are unaware of possible solutions. If your aging parent presents with low income and few assets other than their home, they may be eligible for medicaid health care coverage.
Just a word of caution when applying for a reverse mortgage, read all the fine print.... and ask up front if something happens to you or your loved one or to both, how quickly does the loan have to be paid back? Can you continue to reside the home?
My boss was in for a huge surprise when his wife passed away recently from Alzheimer's.... the loan was in her name... he inherited the house but he had only 30 days to decide if he wanted to refinance the house or put it on the market for sale. Since he didn't have any funds to refinance because all the funds were used to care for his wife at home, he had to sell the house.
I don't know... are you in financial NEED? Are your families material needs not being met since your Mom moved in? If the answer is no, I would probably charge my mother the same amount that she charged me for bringing me into this world..feeding and clothing me, sleepless nights..etc. etc. That's a good place to start..:-)
This is a Department of Veterans Affairs benefit called the Aid and Attendance and Housebound Improved Pension benefit, known as A&A, which can cover the costs of caregivers in the home (including sons and daughters who are paid to be caregivers, though not spouses) or be used for assisted living or a nursing home. The benefit is not insignificant: up to $2,019 monthly for a veteran and spouse, and up to $1,094 for the widow of a veteran.
To qualify, a veteran need NOT have suffered a service-related injury. He or she only had to have clocked at least one day of his or her 90-day minimum military service during a time of war and need caregiving for activities of daily living.
If you know the program’s name and search the Veterans Affairs Web site for Aid and Attendance, the first page states that you are not eligible for A&A unless you already qualify for a basic Veterans Affairs pension — for which you have to be “totally disabled.”
Don't let that "Totally Disabled" statement mislead you!
When a wartime veteran turns 65, the V.A. automatically classifies them as ‘TOTALLY DISABLED,’ And if they meet income and asset criteria, they are eligible for a basic pension.
The department does not reveal maximum allowable assets. But $80,000 (your house and one car are exempt from this total) is a good estimate, though someone with more assets could still qualify if expenses were quite high.
Income limits are not set in stone either. But the maximum is around $20,000 to $23,000 after deducting costs for medical expenses, caregivers, assisted living or nursing home fees.
Study the article above and then go to the nonprofit website for free assistance to apply for this wonderful HIDDEN program: veteranaid.org
I am not associated with the veteranaid.org website, but I wish I had found it because I was my Mother's sole caretaker for the past 15 years and this would have raised my Mother's quality of life tremendously. She passed away last August 13, 2014 and my Heart is broken... Eugene September 28, 2014
Robskirocks3...If your grandfather is a Vet check out Aid & Attendance thru the VA. I got it for my Dad as I live with him and am his caregiver. If there is a Senior Vet Service where you live or go to Social Security website and go to caregiving then to Aid & Attendance. It will help you know while he is still alive but when he passes, the money stops too. It only takes a few months, think I filed in November and was paid first payment in January. Good Luck!
I found a great website this morning when searching for states that permit family caregivers being paid. This link will take you to a document that provides contacts within states that permit the payment for family caregivers.
So I signed up for the Alz. Association. some program that told me I qualified for all kinds of help...the problem is nobody can tell you how to get that! Every time I try it is a bunch of numbers that lead to a bunch of other numbers. One time I was about to jump for joy at the thought of getting meals on wheels which I was told we could get....only to find out it was yet another place that just has resources. Yep, resources that you can't get. They hire someone to answer the phone and tell you all this crap and I could never get anywhere. All these places want is money! No you may not get paid for losing your life and no you may not find any help that doesn't want cash but you may call 24/7. Isn't that comforting?
roxanne, thank you for your input... the only problem is my mom is pow. and they had 70,000 that is his money, which she has controls, and i have to pay for his water heater washing machine ect... makes me so mad... its his money... she tried to get it at the bank and i wouldnt allow it...but later she found a way... he wanted it then for herself.. my grandma said it was to go to her and her sister if anything was left... gpa wants me to have everything but im not so worried about that... its just he needs things now.. no one ever expected her to go first... the money started when my uncle was killed in vietnam 17,000 and grew to 55,000. so they say its there brothers so its theres.... mind u i want my gmas wishes respected as welll....i just need to get paid now for helping him... dementia as well. i cant even leave the house... they are all mad at me cuz my gpa has put half the house in my name and they have 1/2 of the other half.. but he requested they sign it over to me..... i just dont want to fight with my mom too..... im screwed any way i go.. thanks again for listening
i need to get paid for my grandfather 97. he pays the bills so if something happened to him i dont no how i would survive the next months bills... we lost my grandma the day befor thanksgiving 1/12 yrs ago. they raised me .she's always been my very best friend. and he's always been my everything. ilived across the alley for 14 yrs just to be close to them... i live with him now. besides the bills i dont no how im going to pick myself off the floor when he goes.. ive had to hold in her death for his sake, so then i will be dealing with the loss of both..... im so scared for that day.. i really dont think i can survive cuz its going to be a while befor im ok enough to go to work.... any suggestions?? were in new mexico and he had medicare just a little too much but not enough to pay a salery... he's a pearl harbor survivor... now isint that a shame... if it wornt for me loving them so much they would have been in nursing homes and gone along time ago.... i wonder about this country...... he deserves better than that......they need to appreciate what our military does for us..... ad praise these men...
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How to Get Paid to Be a Caregiver for Parents
While my mother has her car sitting in her driveway doing nothing. She won't expect my siblings and their families, with all of their cars, to do any of her driving, and they don't. She won't use her community's shuttle bus or take a cab or use grocery delivery service. I keep reminding her that we only have one car, but she's dismissive, as usual. She's said that if I don't take her to her doctors' appointments, she doesn't have any way of getting there. What if I have car problems or just don't have use of a car -- she won't be able to get to the doctor?
My father-in-law gave my sister-in-law his car for free, because they didn't think she should have to scrape up her own money and take out a loan to buy her own car (the way we had to). I think whoever the parent gives their car to, should be the one who has to do the parent's driving. But that's not how it works with my in-laws. Sister-in-law gets the free car and my husband is expected to do their father's driving with our only car, with the monthly loan payments.
To get paid going back ten years, that depends if your mother can afford to pay you for the past ten years.
If your mother is on Medicaid, check with your State Medicaid office to see if your State has any type of caregiver payment program... not many States do... if they do, chances are it would be minimum wage at a few hours per week. And no, you would not be paid for the past 10 years.
If she is there on Medicaid, I doubt there are programs to pay you. The medicaid waiver program is intended to extend people's stay at home.
I agree with you that family can still provide care and have expenses when the loved one is in a care center. My 3 sisters and I visit Mom at least once a week each, and do little things for her. But we see residents who have no family and who go months between visitors. So Medicaid is correct. People in a nursing home can get by without outside help. The ones who have it, though, are the fortunate ones!
Ive been in the process for months and let me tell you !!! they want so much information.... Ive been managing but... Im suppose to keep a time sheet for everything I do all day!!!!!!! whether its a homemaker service... medical.. or financial.
All 3 are at different rates of pay...... the last thing I want to do at night is fill out a time sheet...
and I going to get reimbursed by the state??? for keeping her out of the nursing home????? cause right now ... I have no income and my check book is tapped out !!!!! Im a single mom as well.. so how this is all happening .. I haven't a clue..
can you say STRESS????????
My boss was in for a huge surprise when his wife passed away recently from Alzheimer's.... the loan was in her name... he inherited the house but he had only 30 days to decide if he wanted to refinance the house or put it on the market for sale. Since he didn't have any funds to refinance because all the funds were used to care for his wife at home, he had to sell the house.
A Little Known Benefit For Aging Veterans:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/veteran-aid-attendance-benefit-long-term-care-156656.htm
This is a Department of Veterans Affairs benefit called the Aid and Attendance and Housebound Improved Pension benefit, known as A&A, which can cover the costs of caregivers in the home (including sons and daughters who are paid to be caregivers, though not spouses) or be used for assisted living or a nursing home.
The benefit is not insignificant: up to $2,019 monthly for a veteran and spouse, and up to $1,094 for the widow of a veteran.
To qualify, a veteran need NOT have suffered a service-related injury. He or she only had to have clocked at least one day of his or her 90-day minimum military service during a time of war and need caregiving for activities of daily living.
If you know the program’s name and search the Veterans Affairs Web site for Aid and Attendance, the first page states that you are not eligible for A&A unless you already qualify for a basic Veterans Affairs pension — for which you have to be “totally disabled.”
Don't let that "Totally Disabled" statement mislead you!
When a wartime veteran turns 65, the V.A. automatically classifies them as ‘TOTALLY DISABLED,’ And if they meet income and asset criteria, they are eligible for a basic pension.
The department does not reveal maximum allowable assets. But $80,000 (your house and one car are exempt from this total) is a good estimate, though someone with more assets could still qualify if expenses were quite high.
Income limits are not set in stone either. But the maximum is around $20,000 to $23,000 after deducting costs for medical expenses, caregivers, assisted living or nursing home fees.
Study the article above and then go to the nonprofit website for free assistance to apply for this wonderful HIDDEN program: veteranaid.org
I am not associated with the veteranaid.org website, but I wish I had found it because I was my Mother's sole caretaker for the past 15 years and this would have raised my Mother's quality of life tremendously. She passed away last August 13, 2014 and my Heart is broken...
Eugene
September 28, 2014
pascenter.org/documents/paid_family_caregiver_programs.pdf