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Playing Along with A Dementia Patient's Realities

126 Comments

AmazingSusan and ionehart - I truly appreciate your feedback.
Blessings to you all. We just carry on.

LisaBGardner, it is astounding that you are still running into resistance over this! Just hang tough. You know what is best!

Thank you for your kind words, KDancy. It sounds like you have wonderful instincts. I wish you and your dad the best.

A beautiful story - thank you! It validates how I go with Dad's stories daily to simply love him and preserve his dignity at age 87. I write and edit professionally, so my world is about accurate storytelling. Being Dad's primary caregiver stretches me in many ways, especially in being flexible ... and learning to be okay with the wildly inaccurate tales of someone I love and respect dearly. :-)

It is so lovely to read this. Thank you. I too was roundly castigated for 'playing along' when staff were 'correcting' a person for believing her daughter was coming to take her on an outing. It always seemed so cruel.

Absolutely 100% spot on.

I loved this post. Thx!!!

Once you form the habit it becomes automatic and everyone is happier. I'm glad that it works for you.
Carol

I really enjoyed the above story. I too, have both parents, one with al-timers and the other with dementia. I also live in dads and moms world when needed. it makes them happy and they feel complete. what ever it takes to make my parents happy and feel wanted and "normal" I will say or do for both of them. that is love......and that is what they deserve......always.................

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Carol, Thank you for the story because I am going through pretty much the same thing. My Dad has been experiencing his own reality and I gotta tell you, it's difficult when he tells me that they(my mother is in the same room with him in a nursing home) went to a motel the night before and took all of their things, including pics on the wall and furniture, but couldn't understand how all of those things got back in the room so quickly. I had to tell him that I brought them back for him and Mom. Most of the time when he has one of these realities, Mom just looks at me and shakes her head. He got mad at me recently because I asked him if he dreamed these things and he said NO to me and told me that it was real. I try to just go along with him when he gets this way in hope that he will forget it the next time I go see him. It's tough. Again thank you for your comments