Give Thanks for the Good Days


It's been a difficult week with Mom. Her constant chanting was so hard on her, and there was nothing that would stop it. Three days in a row, including yesterday, Mom was so uncomfortable. She couldn't even eat due to the chanting.

Last night at midnight they finally gave her an additional dose of Ativan, and she calmed down and slept all night. Today she was so tired that they put her back in bed, which is rare.

When I got there for my visit, there was an aid in her room just watching her sleep. She was unresponsive all day.

When I first spoke to mom, she scared me. I couldn't get her to respond. Then I sang "Michelle, my Belle," the song she always sings to me. I offered her cookies and coffee and her eyes opened up wide. She smiled and said, "You are beautiful, and I love you." Both the aid, Nick, and I let out a sigh of relief.

Nick got Mom up in her wheel chair, and I brought her to her favorite room in the facility. She ate her fig newtons, drank 16 ounces of water and had half a cup of coffee. We sang songs together. Mom responded to me the whole time with love. I'm so thankful for a day of peace for her.

I'm still here holding her hand, but she is very tired, so I'm letting her sleep.

I think a daily nap may be good for Mom. I spoke to her nurse, and we are going to try to incorporate an afternoon nap into her routine. Rest seems to help with the chanting. Fortunately, we had none of that today! It was a good day. My prayers were answered once again. I just want Mom to have peace, and today she did.

I'm trying to stay focused on the good days to add to my “treasure chest." These days help me get through the increasingly difficult days in the world of dementia and its progression.

Growing up in a close family, Michele DeSocio learned about the power of love at a very young age and still maintains that she is happiest when with her loved ones. In 1999, she became caregiver to her mom Jean DelCampo. Michele found her voice as an advocate volunteering for Memory People, an online support and awareness group for dementia.

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