naheaton

he has a few weeks... things getting very grim... throwing up.. on 2 new meds that are helping with that. but his weakness and increased use of 02 and morphine.... turning him to change his diaper is becoming a really hard thing.. mostly for him but the aides and rn's as well. I am on disability for chronic fibromyalgia and lower extremity neuropathy so extra hard for me to help out but so often I have to.
hospice takes care of all the expenses as he is on hospice mediciad thanks for all those ideas though.
I'm struggling with every morning wondering if he will be asleep 4 ever and not wanting to lose him.. but IF he lives to sept it will be 16 months on hospice( plus the 2yrs before that/. his first surgery was 08 2nd surgery 09 then hospice...............

Hi, I just read your "About Me". I know you are praying for your MIL but just to encourage you to not loose hope, I wanted to tell you about my dad. He never wanted to talk with us about God and would even antagonize us and say things that he knew would make us mad. But we kept praying for him, especially my sister. He was a stroke victim and his health steadily declined for several years due to multiple strokes. But you know what, God also used those strokes to whittle down his pride and rebellion and stubbornness. He was by this time bed ridden and after allowing my sister to talk with him one week about the Lord, my dad, prayed with me the following week to ask Jesus to forgive his sins. To watch those words, "Thank you Jesus for dying for my sins", come across the lips of that old swearing sailor was a miracle. I prayed a few other worlds and he squeezed my hands and closed his eyes, I think to pray silently. In the weeks and months that followed he would say things and respond to things that confirmed he really had asked for forgiveness. Just days before his death he would not respond to any thing like "are you hungry" or
'would you like a drink" but when asked if he remembered praying with me, he would say very strongly "YES". God wants no one to perish but for all to come to repentance. You just keep praying and sharing with your MIL when you can. I'll try to pay for her too, looney

my brother is too narisstic to even notice.. that I am caring for his dad, my mom and my dying husband. if he has to do anything f or his wife(who has MS and needs help) he whines about how it cuts int his happy hour at the good ole boys bar in NC. wah wah.Im up twice a night checking on my husband and he is also autistic so that makes it even harder to help him. I dont want to lose him but dont want to see him like this.. a glass of red wine and bed after my micro check of all he needs..and also his parents are in texas.. they are in total denial and their visit her last week was more stress than help. sorry....

thank you thats what i'm talking about. She is 78 I think she might need a new home or assisted living.But she refuses.

Wow there are a lot of new people on this site. Had to sift through tons of questions to find you. How are you?

same thing happened with my mom. while in rehab after a broken leg and a steel rod in it, the doctors told her she needed ALF. My mother went - no problem- but after there went hysterical. Off and on wants to escape. She is 91 today, blind and in a wheelchair, and thinks that she is "well" since she is healed from the leg surgery - in denial that she cannot take care of herself and needs 24 hour care. tries to recruit people to take her to her condo in Fla. I'm in Calif. and trying to pay the bills from her income - I'm the bad guy after making 6-7 trips there at $2,000 each.

i have the POA. I have notified the staff that no one is to take her out of the home. I like how you described him. He is a troublemaker. Today is my mom's birthday and I can't call her since when I do she rants and raves. But sent her candy, bought a cake and spent over $200 last week having her taken out by an aide for hair, nails and an italian dinner, with no appreciation. Not doing it or calling for awhile. She is 91 and wants to move, move, move! and has a great private room with a TV in a private home in Florida.
Thanks for your support.

Thanks for kyour thoughts

Im moving to Pierce County,not sure the name of the city,I have a friend there who is helping me along. I am going up in about 2 weeks to check out the area and look for houses and the job market before I make the final move with my mom. Its just that I have no real support group here in Baltimore,my siblings who lived closer to my mom than I did was doing nothing to help,not taking her to doctors,not visiting her or even going to prepare meals or take her out once in a while. That is why I brought her to my home in baltimore and they still have not visited or called!! I aske for help or a ride and everyone just ignore my calls,so I need help and a change,hope Im doing the right thing!!

Thankyou for your response. I was considering the wheel chair anyway since she has never been on a plane, I was just wondering how do I inform her its a plane ride!! I am moving from Maryland to Washington State. I have no support here from my 2 sisters,(they have an excuse for everything!!),and I brought my mom to live with me ,but I think I bit off more than I can chew. I have a close friend in Washington who his going to help me find a hous,job and center for my mom,I am really losing it here,but my 10 year old grandddaughter,my son and 18 year old grandson try to helpme, but you know they have their lives and when school starts back I have no idea what to do