arose4yu

hiya guys!!! I know I never visit anymore...but really youre always on my mind! I am soooooooooo depressed , even now that momz is in the home ...yep shes been there for about 3 months now.
But it aint been no cakewalk! I have had soooo many battles, finances fallen to nothing! and still more money problems! friends abannoed me...felt love for someone who i thought may be the one...he wasnt! hearbreak, let , downs, and poverty.....hey that could be a soap opera title! lol!!
She constanly calls , and if she doesnt here the magic words..YOUR COMIN HOME FOR GOOD... she looses it! I get insulted hung up on ...MADEA MAHEM!! Guys I still cry my heart out....I still grieve, I am a emotional mess, and whats bad is it depends on her mood...if shes content I will be..if not ..im not...i am soooooo attached to my momz...i know its part grief, and realizing what i have to face...AND FACING IT ALONE.
I try to keep busy...now i am job hunting. I dont go to see her every day ...now its like every other day. She does come home on weekends when I feel THINGS WILL GO OK, AND I CAN GET HER BACK...She has gone back on many occassions understanding that she has to be there for her "treatments" ( she thinks its a hospital) but other times its difficult and she stays...Guys I have come a long way...you have been a big support to me. Dont forget about me...keep my weary spirit and heart in your prayers.
Bree
ps!!!I HAVE NEGLECTED TO SAY MOMZ IS DOING WELL THERE! She doesnt want to be there forever , but she is accepting being there by the week.
As i said she comes home on weekends...when i feel like it.
She gets along well with every one...nurses, patients, aides, adminstrators.....they all thinks shes the bees knees! shes sooooooo sweet to them, She has sneaked in a couple smiles for me too....she is just so damn stubborn! when she starts missin her cats and home ..madea comes out...and the cruelty comes straight at me!

But there have been times i have just walked out..not come back for week! I am learning...but its such a hard way to learn.

jUST PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TO KEEP MY SANITY AND FIND OUT WHO BREE IS , AT THE END OF THIS!
THANKS MY FRENZ!!!

Thanks so much for the hug!! :)

you're very kind thx :-) wayne

thx for your kind advice

We are doing great. Thanks

Hope your doing well. Spring is just around the corner.

Hi guys.....I have managed to get momz in the nursing home...TODAY...A FEW HOURS AGO it wasnt tough at all, God really made a miracle for me...she is ok with it for now. She thinks she will be there for only two weeks...she also thinks its a hospital.
She doesnt see why I she needed this, since she is just sitting alone in her room,she says she can do that at home..
And honestly guys....despite all of the sh$#@! I have gone through with her....I am so messed up, that I am ready to go get her!
Stupid I know. But she is all I have ever had, and I feel like maybe I am being selfish. Maybe I should stick it out , and try to take ccare of her until she doesnt know who I am.
Everybody is saying it will get worse, and I am doing whats right...but I dont feel that now.
Ihave no friends to call , the one I have is busy with work....and her life.
I am in tears...I am really messed up. I dont know what to do anymore.

Thank you arose4u, I didn't know that such a loop existed. I am just now learning the whole confusing Medicare mess. I appreciate your knowledge.

MY FRIENDS!!
I have been getting the legal stuff handled..power of attorney, living ill, etc. I have found a nursing home, gotten medical files to them...its coming close to being done.
Whats EVEN MORE MIRACULOUS IS : MOMZ IS BEING AGREEABLE TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!My prayers are being answered!!
I have told her its a major health problem...well one she will accept( cuz she refuses to believe she has alzheimers!) like blood vessels working inncorrectly which can cause her a stroke..so she accepts this, and agrees MOST of the time ( she changes her mind or forgets and I have to remind her...man am i tired of explaining- just talking so much!!my mouth needs a vacation! I have nevr begged, explained, pleaded so much in my life!!) to go to the "HOSPITAL" FOR 2 WEEKS. I will handle the rest of the battle after I get her in there!

i HOPE EVERYONE IS DOING WELL AND HOLDING UP, I NEVER WOULD HAVE GOTTEN THIS FAR WITHOUT YOU ALL!!!

I usually feel like the "odd" one out as I'm a single guy, in his late 30's taking care of my 86 yo father with AZ. You've got double! Hugs for that.