When is it time to put my Mom in a facility?

It sounds like the time is now.

When to place a loved one in a care center has two parts: 1) the health/capabilities or the loved one and 2) the ability/interest/resources of the caregiver. Often the loved one declines and at the same time the caregiver gets older, suffers from stress, and may experience burnout.

I see in your profile that you moved to be able to care for your mother. It sounds like you are at the point where the best way to continue to care for her is to get some professionals involved. You will still be involved on her care team, but it won't be an all-consuming role. You can begin to rebuild your own life.

Start by discussing this with her doctor. Another great resource (at least in our state) is to call your county's Social Services and ask for a needs assessment. If mother is going to need some financial aid to pay for services SS will know what is available and how to apply. Even if she doesn't need/doesn't qualify for financial help, Social Services can direct you to resources available in her community.

Until this is resolved, can you take the car keys? A traffic accident could be tragic and in any case would greatly complicate the situation.

It is time, and you talk to her MD about what your options are, because he makes the recommendations for placement. Go to the Find Housing and Care box, enter your zipcode and click on Memory Care. Very helpful link.