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Harry, you are in a hard spot, since you have no authority here. Neither does the POA son, if his mother is fully competent to make her own decisions.

What are some of the decisions they disagree about? Could what the son is trying to do be considered abuse? Taking advantage of a vulnerable adult?
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what I do if I am the carer - a role I grew into, as I only rented a room to begin with - and the patient's son is the POA, and this POA thinks that being a POA means he's entitled to make all decisions for his parent - not just financial ones.
The patient has 100 percent of brain faculties and is able to make their OWN decisions. I feel in between these two as the carer, and they both want separate things sometimes.
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what I do if I am the carer - a role I grew into, as I only rented a room to begin with - and the patient's son is the POA, and this POA thinks that being a POA means he's entitled to make all decisions for for his parent - not just financial decisions. The patient has 100 percent of brain faculties and is able to make their OWN decisions. I feel in between these two as the carer, and they both want separate things sometimes.
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Anytime you sign your name and forget to write POA after it, you can be held responsible. You sign them in to the nursing home: write POA. You use their credit card: write POA. Anytime they are Medicaid pending, you give the NH the entire check or the NH will sue and the NH will win. Other debts are always secondary, including a mortgage, utilities, credit cards, you name it. If you did it in the wrong order, you find yourself in a deep dark hole.
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My mother has been approved for Medicaid, however, there remains a balance of 100,000 after payment from Medicaid. The nursing home states that during the application approval wait the ss check should have been paid to the nursing home. I am POA for her and during that time I used the funds to solely pay her outstanding debts..such as her credit card debt, ARRP health insurance etc. They are now claiming I am responsible for paying this outstanding debt because I am the POA...huh????
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The POA becomes effective when the person who issued it is incompetent. Most commonly this must be certified by a doctor. Once declared incompetent, the POA must be filed with the bank on which the funds will be withdrawn. The POA will specify what the powerholder may do. It is usually very broad like pay bills, file taxes etc. It is imperative that when dealing with the nursing home the powerholder on the POA sign EVERYTHING as POA such as: Jane Doe POA for Alice Smith. This way, the nursing home, hospitable etc cannot come after you for any outstanding debt when the patient passes away. If you just sign Jane Doe, they will claim you are personally responsible for any outstanding debt. The POA is very effective to handle finances for someone just be sure to do it correctly.
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I am not sure what is being asked, but I'll try. The POA for finances is responsible for using the assets of a person to meet the needs of the person. This includes paying their bills. The POA does not use their own money, but the money of the person they are the agent for. The POA is simply an agent for the person and acts in their stead. So bills are paid when they come due. The POA, however, is not personally responsible for debts unless the POA chooses to be.
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