My mother's expensive, uninsured ring disappeared from her hand while she was asleep in her assisted living home. Do we have legal recourse if something is seems stolen?

Did you talk to the asst living place? Ask some questions as to who was working that night and would've been in your mom's room? I'd start there. But I have to tell ya after a year of my mother-in-law thinking people are stealing from her where she lives (also asst living) I've grown a little skeptical. My husband (her son) found her teeth in her purse wrapped in a kleenex recently after searching high and low for them in her room. She was sure they had been stolen. Ah come on... really?

Jackalee, I don't know if you have any recourse, but I hope there will be a lot of people who read your post. A dear friend of mine ended up in a nursing home. This was supposed to be a highly rated facility, but all too often things went missing. Good sweatsuits, shirts.... There was no way he could have misplaced them, because he had had a stroke and couldn't move on his own. Everyone, please be careful with the belongings you send with your loved ones.

Jackalee: Please talk to the administrator at the ALF and review the 'contract' or similar document regarding the facilities responsibility for 'personal effects'. I think you are going to find that they are NOT responsible for personal effects and in many cases ANYTHING that is not provided by their facility.

That (unfortunately) being said there is a HUGE lesson for all to learn. DO NOT LEAVE EXPENSIVE items with your loved one (even IF it is insured). If they cannot LIVE without 'an item' get an inexpensive replica of the ring, necklace, clock, etc.

I spent MANY MANY hours in the Alzheimer's unit when my mother was there, and saw how INNOCENTLY another resident would come into her room, and pick up an item thinking it was theirs! Or just to 'hold' it or wear it. Glasses, sweaters, shoes, even blouses and undies 'went missing' from my mothers AND other's rooms, and to be honest, it was not malicious intent by the residents and certainly a near impossiblity for the staff to keep track of where items belonged that were NOT labeled. WHEW... long sentence!

We labeled EVERYTHING Mom had there and inventoried her clothing, even PHOTOGRAPHED her closet to keep track of things.

With regards to jewelry, we did in fact replace the rings she cherished with rings that would not be a financial LOSS if they were lost!

Her dentures went missing and since Mom was unable to get around on her own, the facility did agree to pay for a replacement denture, BUT, and this is a BIG but, cautioned us that her new dentures should be 'engraved' with her name.

There may be some liability on their part, but I would not count on it. Have them check clothing, with laundry, and even with other residents, but I wouldn't count on finding it. I am so sorry.

Even if a list was taken of her jewelry it would only say color of stone and not the value the above suggestion of replacing the valueable jewelry with costume jewelry is a great idea.

My mom's SNF is the same way - if her name is not on it, they don't even apologize. We have had favorite food stolen probably by other residents, clothing disappears, sometimes to reappear later, elevating footrests were lost, expensive diabetic shoes gone (socks I could understand, and we replace those by the half dozen - but SHOES??? Who knew you had to put your name in your shoes?) and now her watch as she went from ER to room at the hospital. Some is disorganization and some is theft. (That nice ring was almost certainly stolen. There are people who think nothing of theiving from the most vulnerable who can't resist or report them. You already have all the correct advice on that.) ANY personal medical equipment - and every detachable part of any given piece of medical equipment has to be conspicuously labeled or the facility assumes it belong to them to do as they please with. It does not seem to be top priority for hurried, hassled PCAs to remember that it realy hurts for people to be deprived of things they need, or of some favorite item that may be one of the few things they even have left to call their own.

I keep an indelible marker in a certain spot in my mom's drawer to do or redo her name on anything that needs it - and believe it or not, on one occasion the MARKER was taken and not returned by someone! All her drawers are gone through and rearranged, maybe not every time I visit or even every week, but even labeling drawers and keeping a sign up that we do Mom's laundry does not work all the time. I'm told that's because some facility staff can't read.

I literally saw my mother's ring slip off her finger when she was ill because she had lost so much weight so I'd be careful thinking someone else took it. We also had plenty of times when my mother said jewelry items had been stolen from her by the cleaning ladies in the AL facility and we always found them hidden in very odd places by my mother and usually wrapped in kleenex.

I agree with the reponses above. Every thing of value even new clothing as been stolen from my mother. We have had the police involved etc. The people who work in these facilities are underpaid and little has been done in the way of backround checks. Just keep the pressure on the facility. It does help.

Probably theft but are you sure she didn't give it to someone? My mom is always giving things to my greedy sister, then claiming she has "no idea" what happened to them. When I've followed up with her assisted living, she's then admitted giving the items to sis.

my mother had her wedding ring on when she went into the first home, she was admitted to hospital with a fracture of the lower leg within 17 days, I noticed her ring was missing. When I questioned the home about it, they said she didn't have one on when she went into the home. I said yes she did because I did her nails on the morning of the day she went in, I thought at the time should I remove it but thought it wasn't mine to take... of course she couldn't tell me because of her dementia. The solicitor queried it but to no avail.

I am hopeful that each person that reads the (unfortunate) occurrences that happen in ALF's, rehab and nursing homes learns from others experiences and does differently with their loved ones.

I don't believe it is wrong to think that we can leave valuables with our loved ones and expect them to be there when we return to visit, but I don't believe it will always happen. Be careful what you leave with your loved ones and DOCUMENT any personal effects for your piece of mind, and have someone at the 'facility' aware of these items too. If they cannot assume liability (this will most like be the case) then DO NOT leave the items at the facility! This is a sad fact, but a true one.

If ONE person learns from our mistakes, then all is not in vain.