How can I get my mother to trust recommendations from me, other caregivers, or her doctors?

Asked by abu09  |  Dec 28, 2009

Having problems with getting my mom to trust my recommendations to be seen by any or a caregiver, doctor, professional etc. She is stubborn and has black pride

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Carol Bradley Bursack, Dec 29, 2009

Over the span of two decades author, columnist and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Because of this experience, Bradley Bursack created a portable support group, the book "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories."

 

Many elders get stubborn about this, especially is they suspect something is wrong, so a parent not wanting to see a doctor is a problem for many people. Is there a pastor or close friend who can get somewhere with her? Third party help can sometimes do wonders.

You mention "black pride" - that made me think of my father-in-law who thought it was totally inappropriate for a female nurse to bathe him. I can't imagine if he'd had a female doctor! Your mom grew up during horrible racial times. If race is an issue, perhaps if there isn't a black doctor near by, would there be one from India or anywhere but the stereotypical white doctor?

In any event, someone outside of the family whom she trust may have more luck than you.

Please keep coming back for support. This gets tough.
Carol

 
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