Is there basic criteria to determine when someone needs to move into assisted living?

Asked by chilu  |  Jul 7, 2010

My mom is caring for my Grandmother. At what point does a person need to move into assisted living home? Are there basic criteria? My granny still drives, but comes home with dents and/or scratches all the time. She hords junk (broken discarded items) and compulsive shops at thrift stores. So much so that she has filled her home (twice) and her son's home up, leaving only small walking trails to a couple of rooms. She does not clean up after herself. Dishes, papers, food and drinks are all left where ever she used them. She digs in her garden and attempts to clean up, but is unable to "see" that she is still dirty/smelly. She is often told by family members that she needs to shower. She is very smart with money and her church and can carry on a sane conversation. She does have a few health problems, but nothing that would prevent her from living on her own. She is a very good manipulator and tells people what they want to hear then plays on the elderly in poor health card if someone questions. She often blames her behaviors on other family members. She admited to starting arguments on purpose, just to argue.

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Carol Bradley Bursack, Jul 8, 2010

Over the span of two decades author, columnist and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Because of this experience, Bradley Bursack created a portable support group, the book "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories."

 

First, she should see a doctor. She may have obsessive compulsive disorder, or some type of dementia. Since she covers so well in public (to the utter frustration of caregivers this is horribly common), the move makes it harder. She certainly seems to be a candidate for more care, though in-home care may help if she will allow it.

There's no real criteria for AL, but generally when people can't properly care for themselves, or they are in danger of falls or other issues, the move is made.

I do think a doctor could help you with the decision if you can get her there.
Carol

 
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