What do you do when someone refuses going to see the doctor and cancer treatment?

Asked by bawgdc  |  Jun 10, 2010

My husband has cancer, but makes excuses for not going to see his doctor and refuses treatment. What should I do?

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NancyH

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Jun 10, 2010

You know him better than anyone. Is he the kind of person that has trouble facing difficult things? Has he thrown in the towel so to speak and doesn't want to fight the cancer? He can't know for sure if it's gonna kill him till he gets the facts right? Personally, I would want to know EVERYTHING about the cancer I had, but then I suppose not everyone is that way.
Pick his brain, see where he's coming from.

 
 

Elizza

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Jun 16, 2010

I agree - it is important to find out why he will not go. He has a reason and if he can't tell you, is there someone else he can talk with?
You don't want to be arguing with him at a time when you both need each other so much . . . . try to get on the same side and see how he is thinking.

 
 

Aleeta

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Jun 16, 2010

He may be in denial. He may have decided to avoid unpleasant medical procedures, high medical bills, or an extension of life he deems will lack much quality. He may have decided not be 'be a burden' to loved ones.
His age and/or other health conditions may be a factor in his decision. (You did not state how old he is.)

Here is an article from the LA Times which touches on some of these points.
http://articles.latimes.com/2007/feb/05/health/he-enough5/4

 
 

Jaye

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Jun 16, 2010

It is possible bless his heart that he is just done... We are facing this with my Daddy he is just tired and getting weaker. I would have a serious and honest chat with him. I know it is not easy but I am sure that you want to respect his wishes... take care J

 
 

Angela

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Jun 16, 2010

Enjoy every moment you have together. Love him and respect his wishes. Go on that dream trip, eat off the china, take a bubble bath together and use the "good" towels. It's not how long you stay together, it's what you do with that time!

 
 

Jaye

Give a Hug

Jun 17, 2010

very good advice Angela...

 
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