Needing to vent

Hi Roxie.

I have been there many times, and so have many others on this site. Truly being aware of what you are seeing when someone you love decline if impossible to describe to anyone who does not see it. That goes for friends, family and many times even spouses....You are special because you truly see and you truly care.

You have come to the right place - at least we all understand, and can reach out when we have some time.... 24/7 is very hard, what I have learned is to make the best of what there is in each day. I sometimes feel that a caregivers life is like the lead character in the movie "Life is Beautiful" with Robert Bennini. - If you haven't seen it, you may enjoy it, as it shows how humour can help cope with anything.

That said, the toll shouldering the burden takes can be very hard. Harder still if there are others who could help you but just dont *get it*. The best advice I can give you about your fear of losing control is to let go - breathe - cry - breath again. You will feel better if you release the tension rather than trying to control how you feel.

stay on this board and ask as many questions as you want - vent as much as you want - say what no one else wants to hear. I know lots of people will respond - so I'll just say - welcome - you've found a safe place to talk.

take care and be kind to yourself.

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Roxie,
I can so relate to your situation! I have been caring for my mother since a health crisis debilitated her about 4 years ago. It seems that she , too, declines every day. I fell obligated to care for my mother as long as I physically can

Thank you so much for your advice and comments. This means so much to me. Well yesterday I had a melt-down day. I cried and cried and cried. Today I feel so much better. I am ready to take the responsibilities on again. My mind is taking a fresh look at everything. Just knowing I am not alone with being a caregiver has helped so much. Even though I feel alone in my home and I am the one that does everything I still know there are people out there that has and is doing this now. They completely understand if I want to fall apart once in a while.
I have someplace to vent and talk with others that understand this is great!!!!
Thanks again. I will be back maybe to help someone else if not just to vent again.
Thanks

I think my message was cut off! Even though I feel obligated to care for my mother until her death, that doesn't mean that I am always positive and upbeat about it. I'm afraid that the day to day crisises often get me down,too! I spend a lot of time in my back yard crying where no one will see me. I think the important thing is that even though we get down, we get back up and continue the fight. And I know that when this time is over, we will all be glad that we stuck it out. I know that I will have no regrets in caring for my mom. I know some others who will never be able to say that. Hang in there!

As I said before I cried all day yesterday but of course it was alone in my back yard and on the front porch. I understand now there will be days that will be good and days that will not. Like this evening so was doing great then all of sudden she wasn't. That is how it goes. Not saying I will not have another bad day in a few but for right now I can handle what is thrown at me. It is because of you guys. I am so glad I found this site.