Posted in: Community Discussions » Stress Relief & Inspiration
CAK
May 15, 2008
So many things Jacqueline Marcell says are so accurate and she says to put on the emotional shield to deflect the behaviours. I agree except that I already know that if I get upset with mom after repeating myself for the 16th time on every single solitary issue that comes up during the day, mother will get upset and we'll have a downward spiral that goes on for days. So, I pay the price for showing ANY frustration or lack of patience at all. It's really hard to not let anything get to you - bitterness, resentfulness - I actually think I do pretty well most of the time but eventually, I just am worn out repeating the same things over and over and over and over and over and now, putting on the emotional shield just means I am to be perfect ALL THE TIME and never, ever let any of this get to me. I'm really scared and alone. I can't just walk away for a few minutes b/c mom can't be left alone. I can easily see myself having a stroke and where will that leave her?! I just needed to vent this morning, I guess. Sorry
AgingCare Editor
May 15, 2008 Suggest Removal
No need to apologize. That's what this community is for: to share trials, tribulations and vent without fear of being judged or reprisal. Have you thought about counseling? Sometimes, talking to an objective third party does wonders for the soul and peace of mind. Take a look at this article:
http://www.agingcare.com/Featured-Stories/126208/The-Importance-of-Counseling-for-Caregivers.htm
cindi
May 17, 2008 Suggest Removal
Cak,
try respite care. We all need time alone and away. Without it I would surely not do wellat all. Not that I am great even with it. We are not perfect and it's okay. We just do our best. Sometimes I am pretty patient and other times I feel like if she says another word I will lose it.
Cindi
Decor426
May 19, 2008 Suggest Removal
Cak, you are the bigger person for not engaging in negativity with your mom. You didn't say why you have to repeat yourself is it a hearing problem? What is her illness? How old is she? My Dad is 94 and he can't hear well at all he doesnb't like the hearing aid I have to repeat alot too it is frustrating. Let us all know more about your situation. Decor
One option is to reverse the swing of the door. It may be possible to change the swing out into the hall or the bedroom. This change will require a bit of handyman work and some paint, but could be a good option. Read full answer.
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