naheaton commented
7/7/2010 at 7:04 pm
I have been one of the daughter-in-laws that have been taking care of my mother-in-law for the last 2 years since my father-in-law died. It has mainly fallen to me for her care giving though, since I
...Read MoreI have been one of the daughter-in-laws that have been taking care of my mother-in-law for the last 2 years since my father-in-law died. It has mainly fallen to me for her care giving though, since I'm closest geographically and don't travel like my sis-in-law does with her husband. Even though my m-i-l lives in an asst living facility now, I'm still the one that picks her up and takes her places. At some point I had to ask myself 'why' do I do it? You are going to have to ask yourself the same question eventually. Do you do it for the recognition of a job well done? Do you do it to show your siblings how much more you care for your dad? Or do you do it just because. Because you love and respect him, and it's the right thing to do? If it's just 'because' then you must let whatever resentment you have for your dad go. He's the same guy as he always was I suspect, nothing has changed except your attitude. If it's because they owe him money and never paid him back, that's between them and him. Who cares? If he was not ill and doing his own thing, would you still resent his wanting to be around you? I hate to admit it, but money has gotten in the way of more families than I care to imagine. My uncle has bailed two of his kids out over and over again, with them NEVER paying him back and that used to stick in the craw of one of the other brothers who was self-sufficient. If your siblings owe their dad money that could be why they don't want to be around him, guilt. So let it go, enjoy your dad while he's still here, cause he'll be gone soon enough then nothing will matter. And tell your wife how much you appreciate what she does for your dad. I know my husband tells me so on a regular basis. Take care now.
Like this
(0) | Give a hug