Answered a question 2/25/2010 at 11:28 pm
I find many of us no longer attend church because so many church congregations are worse than strangers when it comes to understanding the lives of caregivers and the ill. We found that we had no off
...Read MoreI find many of us no longer attend church because so many church congregations are worse than strangers when it comes to understanding the lives of caregivers and the ill. We found that we had no offers from our last congregation to get out/make friends, requests to help during spouse's many surgeries (perhaps baby sit as to allow some breathing room/time to not have to tend to twelve things at once), nor did we experience any simple phone calls just to touch base. Seems unless you've directly experienced medical tribulations, most are ignorant of the feelings/needs of others. Also, there is the pressure to spend more time at the church (hard to do when working, raising kids and tending to ill spouse/dealing with the medical and other financial based paperwork), and lastly, there is the sheer guilt of not being financially sound as to allow for tithing when dealing with the strains that illness causes to our fiscal survival which all play a part in why many of avoid organized religious gatherings so to speak. I find that my elderly clients (80% of my workplace clientele) are perhaps the most able to understand my plight/I connect the best with these acquaintances, but they dont have mortgages and children still at home, and had 30, 40, 50 years of a healthy spouse to enjoy v. our (and millions of others) situation of having your lives turned upside down in your 30's (effectively robbed of your good times/memories to lean on when in your golden year before being allowed to build them due to illness or injury or both.