Commented on a discussion 4/24/2008 at 11:20 am
Has anyone ever taken the above discussion and replaced 'parent ' with 'sibling'? My sibling has many health issues and depends totally on her husband, who also has his own health issues. He is 15
...Read MoreHas anyone ever taken the above discussion and replaced 'parent ' with 'sibling'? My sibling has many health issues and depends totally on her husband, who also has his own health issues. He is 15 years older than her and in very poor health. It is very possible that he will pass on before her in the near future and it will be "up to me" to provide care or find a place that can.
The problem is that she and I can hardly be in the same room for more than a few hours, sometimes minutes. She has now and has always had a very vicious tongue. She's demanding and critical and demeaning with those closest to her. It has been her husband's choice to remain with her for many years and cater to her every whim. I have tried to have a conversation about what her choices would be when her husband passes on, but she chooses to avoid these issues and I feel sure she assumes that I will pick up where her husband left off. My other siblings chose long ago to have nothing to do with her. I also have health issues and am limited in my physical strength and energy and am not able to take this "massive" task on. I, too, know the sting of dysfunction that occurred in our childhood family, but every day I get up and make a conscious effort to be positive and loving to those around me. And I know with every part of my being that I could not undertake the responsibility of caring for my sister. But....the guilt about family does riddle me. And I don't see that dissapating. Any thoughts?