Commented on a discussion 4/30/2009 at 11:46 pm
I too care for my widowed aging mother, I am not well myself, actually she seems to have better health than I. Shortly, on her 85th Birthday, she has invited her 82 yr. old sister, also a widow, to m
...Read MoreI too care for my widowed aging mother, I am not well myself, actually she seems to have better health than I. Shortly, on her 85th Birthday, she has invited her 82 yr. old sister, also a widow, to move from Pennsylvania her to Colorado to love with her. My younger brother died last year so now I have two elderly women to care for. Neither can drive, don't see or hear well. At first I was obstinate. Then on reconsidered. Why shouldn't they enjoy their aging as they did their youth. They will enrich each others last years. So I am changing my attitude. I will also be hopeful that I can find some outside day help. Some counties have grant money for respite care, housekeeping, meals, etc. I have found thst caregivers for the elderly are usually tender hearted and helpful. If your parents need more time, attention and financial help contact your local health department for available help. I have someone come in once a week to clean the kitchen, bathroom, change bedding. I take Mom grocery shopping, hire someone to cut the grass, and take her beloved pet to the vets. She and I disagree, but we always call and say good night. When she was injured a few years ago, her insurance paid for a nurse to come into the home to tend the wound after she was released from rehab, check with their insuance carrier or change to a better plan if you can. There are can be options you are not aware of. If parental care is disruptive to your marriage, try to get some additional help, moving away may not be the only answer or maybe moving the parents is an option you really haven't considred.