Commented on a discussion 8/27/2011 at 8:31 am
Hi Parkinsons caregivers. I married my husband 8 years ago after knowing him for a couple months. He was 69 and I 68.. Looking back I'm sure he had the on set of P.D. back then. Things gradually g
...Read MoreHi Parkinsons caregivers. I married my husband 8 years ago after knowing him for a couple months. He was 69 and I 68.. Looking back I'm sure he had the on set of P.D. back then. Things gradually got worse. He is at a point where he doesn't drive, cut grass, fix anything around the house, pull weeds etc. All he seems to want to do is , take his pills (obsessed) eat and not do much of anything. I don't think he is incapable of doing a lot of things if he takes his time but I don't think he wants to. Like; pull weeds, clean up a mess.. He use to fix his own breakfast now he always asks me, "will this hurt me if I eat it" He asks constantly, day after day. Is it time to take my pills, over and over. Worse than a little kid obsessed with something. I'm sure he gets frustrated. If we had had years of being together before this happened I think it would be easier to be more patient. I never know if his stubborness is due to the disease or if he is just being a cranky old poop. When I am cranky with him I always feel terrible afterwards, thinking, "why can't I be more patient". I keep thinking, "I know it will constantly get worse" am I going to be able to handle what comes? What am I going to do if I find I can't handle it anymore. I know I put all kinds of guilt trips on myself. I constantly find myself getting aggitated with him when he expects me to do little things for him that I feel he can do for himself.
Like you gals, I don't know what to expect next. I do know for a fact that it will never get better. He stubbed his toe, fell and cracked a hip. That was a long recovery. Thank goodness for home health aids. They taught us how to do a lot of things..Like a safe way to take a shower. Physical therapy taught him how to get out of a chair. (That really helped) He has had P.T. sessions a couple of different times and they have really helped. Even though he does his exercises at home they don't seem to help as much as when he does them at the center. Maybe just getting out of the house is good for him. One thing I have started to do that seems to help me is distance myself mentally from him. When he wants me to do little things for him I think to myself, "If a neighbor or friend asked me to do this, would I do it for them. My answer to myself is YES I definately would. Without hesitation,..So do it for him and don't resent it.
He quit driving a year after we got married so I have to take him where ever and when ever he wants to go somewhere. I feel overwhelmed.
He falls asleep quite often. Especially at the kitchen table. He will drool everytime he falls asleep. This is so sad. Always has a lot of excess syliva. If he sucks on a piece of hard candy this helps him swallow more, therefore less slyvia. I have bought him slip on clothes with elastic waistbands and shoes with velcroe closures. Just make sure the velcroe is long enough to keep the shoe closed securely. Buttons are a real problem. Don't expect them to be able to button anything. Well,,,I'm getting of hearing myself talk so I will close. Please ask me any questions you want. I'm not sure I will be able to answer them but I will sure try. Good Luck to all you caregivers. Love, Dane