Lilliput

thank you so much. i think mom would adjust fine,she would have more people to see her. She is withdrawing and all she does is sits in her room alone each day. I would never try to do anything to jeaporadize her. That's my Mom and I do love her

Hi Lilliput
lcs here. You wrote that you don't think that when you are old that you will have the courage that your mom now has. It is my hope for you that when you are in your mom's position, you will have someone there for you just as you are there now for your mom. I also think that by the time you are in the position your mom is in now that you WILL have gained the courage! I wish that for you with all my heart. I have always agreed with whoever it was that said that "old age is not for sissies". It seems that there is NO stage of life that is easy. I guess we are put on earth to gain courage and wisdom so that we can go on to the next stage after we die physically. Kindest regards.

your inputs are very true, appropriate and correct. We all wish our parents are as open as we are now, then we will have averted or avoided some family clashes & fights and bitterness, and finger-pointing.

Thanks for the hug, I really appreciate it. My best to you in whatever your decision. <3

it broke my heart to hear that ur friend of 30 yrs stop coming around .
i just hope my friend of my lifetime dont stop coming around . i am takin care of my dad and notice that my friend s quit askin us over for cookou t etc , but i invite them
over here .
now my husband of 30 yrs is complain both arms aching , (he s got 6 stents in him ) sounds like he will need another one , :-(..
im so lost cuz heres my dad 86 yrs old sick and my husband s heart is a achin , he justtook a nitro pill and says his arms quit achin , sounds like i will be takin him to hospital soon ...
if my friends dont give me moral support then i will know theyre not my friends at all .

Thanks, Lilliput! It's important - and such a great help - to be supportive of each other!

We live in Beaverton Oregon, which is a suburb west of Portland.
There are numerous asst. living places in our area that have just popped up the last 5 years or so. There is a senior center in Beaverton that is pretty popular. We have Loaves and Fishes out here, and lots of transportation for disabled/seniors. The public transportation (TriMet) has lift buses that will take wheelchairs and maybe 6-8 people right to their doors. We used to schedule a regular ride with them for Marjie when she was visiting her husband everyday at the foster care place. He was a retired TriMet supervisor, so she gets to ride for free forever. But it's not that expensive anyway. TriMet sent us out a form that we filled in and her doctor, giving her the right to ride, and also take a caregiver with her for free.
I love Oregon especially the west side. It's the best of both worlds out here. We are 70 miles from Mt Hood, and 70 miles from the beach. Win Win. Let me know where you're planning on living okay?

Hi Lilliput,
I will send a condensed version of how I have been fortunate to be able to respect my mother's wishes to remain at home. It's just her, my father passed years ago. It has been a mixture of luck and preserverence. Thank you for your interest. I am in the take care of Dan mode today, but I will respond.

DanielR

Thanks Lilliput, OK, "needs" first. I'll remember that. :~)