Family caregiver assistance programs for caregivers of elderly parents

My mom had two houses in her name so we cannot get medicaid. Or anything else for 3 to 5 yrs. It is hard because I had to stop working to care for her full time. It cost more to pay for help than I made a month so it was cheaper for me to do it.After I used all my resources up we are now living on her S.S. So here we are. She just started Hospice . That is the only thing that saved us. They pay for all her needs and we have money leftover for bills and food. Thanks to Hospice.

If you have other brothers and sisters, you should ask them if you can get paid for the majority of the work. I am primary caregiver for my m-i-l who has Alzheimer's Disease (AD). I am getting paid--but only because my s-i-l who is Durable Power of Attorney agreed and she also went to a lawyer to iron out everything.

Family caregivers (children not spouses) can also get paid to help their aging parents through the VA Aid and Attendance Improved Pension.

I thought there might be a ray of hope for me in your multi-faceted answer. But there isn't. There is a maddening aspect to caregiving for a family member because even if they have money to pay you, it is NOT allowed. I understand why because of the threat of financial elder abuse. However, their "rich" situation puts the full time family caregiver in a dire situation. My mother was put under county conservatorship because of my two sister's financial elder abuse, and they made me 24/7 caregiver. Oh, after many months, they decided I could get $10 a day, but that was a stretch for them to allow that. But HEY, let's spend a fortune taking the cats to the vet because they are important to my mother. What am I? Chopped liver? If something happens to me, their concern is making sure my mom has A caregiver at all times. Even inheritance laws don't protect me. My thieving sisters, who of course split way before they were reported...they'll get their fair share. I'm waiting for SOMETHING. These are mostly ways to get more help for the CLIENT not for the CAREGIVER.

CJWright,
I would really suggest that you find a good attorney.

I understand your situation. My grandmother, who has Alzheimer's, lives with me and my family. Her son wouldn't take her in. My wonderful husband agree for her to move in with us. So, we bought a duplex and had it renovated into one house so that she could have her own living area. We thought we'd be able to sell our little 2br/1ba house, but three years later we still have it. We've lost all of our savings in having to pay two mortgages.... we won't ever recover that. We've also gone thousands of dollars in debt trying to keep up with everyday bills... and take care of our own two daughters.

My grandmother helps some with the utilities, but we get no help otherwise; and we have to "prove" where that money is going. And as far as the school is concerned for the free/reduced lunch program, we have to count that money as income eventhough she is the one who uses the utilities.

My uncle had everything of hers put in his name soon after my grandfather passed away. She never changed the will, so with my mother gone, everything goes to him. We probably will be paying off bills for decades just because we took her in.

Because I'm only a granddaughter and not her daughter, I have no legal rights (according to an attorney I've spoken with) eventhough I'm the one caring for her. You, CJ, are your mother's daughter and you should have more legal rights over your sisters because you are her caregiver. I'd definitely seen an attorney's advice.