Caregivers, this month is for you. November is officially National Family Caregivers Month. Will you take time to honor yourself this month? Likely, it hasn’t occurred to you, as you are too busy keeping up with your job, your kids and your caregiving duties. You are too busy keeping doctor appointments for others, and trying to prioritize all of the demands on your time, to take time for yourself. But you need to take time to pat yourselves on the back.
It’s important to remember, however, that National Family Caregivers Month isn’t just about honoring those who give care. It’s about reminding you to take better care of yourself.
On our AgingCare.com community forum, we have members who talk of putting off their own mammograms, their own blood pressure checks, their own mental health needs, because they feel they are too busy, and often too broke, to do these things for themselves.
The big question is this: What happens to the people you are racing about caring for, if you become disabled or die? What happens to the mother you are trying to keep out of a nursing home if you have to undergo surgery, chemotherapy and radiation for a breast tumor, when you catch it at stage 4, rather than as a suspicious “shadow” on your mammogram early on?
What happens is exactly what you were trying to prevent, only worse. Your mother will have to go into a nursing home because you can’t care for her when you are sick. Worse yet, you won’t be able to help her with the transition, and she will know the reason. Even if you don’t tell her, she will know that you put off your needs to care for her. And she will feel guilty.