Sister living with elderly mom taking her money

My sister moved here from another state to live with my widowed mom 14 years ago. Nver has paid any expenses, ultilities, etc.
Now my mother has brokedn her hip, uses a walker, and doesn't want to be alone, and has finagled a way to get $800 a month from my mother to care for her, AND my mother is still paying all expenses and buying food.
Do you think it is right for me, (her executor) to tell my sister she needs to stop charging my mother for any food. My mother wieghs 90 pounds and barely eats anything. And my sister is somewhat of a hoarder, buying stuff for her future when my mother dies.
And the worse part is they don't even get along and are like oil and water.
She cannot live with me and my husband, we have steps to bathroom, and bedrooms are upstairs.
My husband is not well, diabetes, epilepsy...we try to travel a bit, so one nice thing is my sister is there. But, it's the principle of the whole thing that eats at me.
Someone please clear my head.
Thank you.

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goldenyrs

Give a Hug

Sep 10, 2010

Being an executor means nothing until your mother has died. If you want control, you must get your mother to sign over her power of attorney to you. But first, ask yourself, is the satisfaction of making sure your sister doesn't get the $800 a month worth the full burden of your mother's care. It sounds like you have very little responsibility for her now. If you wrest control from your sister and don't plan to assume the burden of caring for her yourself, be prepared to pay at least $2000 a month (depending upon where you live) for someone else to take over.

 
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