My father-in-law, who lives with us, is stressing me out!!

Could the daughters take him for awhile? Might be a good eye-opener for both. You are treating him as a "guest" in your home, when he should be treated as any other family member would. He should not be disrespectful of you or your husband. Try giving him some space and not hovering over him. Do not pick up after him or overdo in any way...especially if he is healthy. He is being turned into a tall child and will continue this behavior for as long as he can get away with it.
I have always said that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Have the hub sit down with him and have a frank, unemotional discussion about the rules of your home (your requests are not unreasonable). If he still ignores you, it may be time to take him to a facility or two and let him choose one.
Really......we wouldn't let a child get away with bad behavior...why should that change when an adult enters our home.
good luck
Lilli

Ond daughter live in ca and has him for a couple of weeks each year. The other daughter lives 6 miles away but want nothing to do with him. He an inconvience to her and her husband refuses to let FIL in their home. He wet on there bathroom floor and has refuse to let him come back. Husband has had many talks with him about how he is part of "OUR" family and he should act accordingly. We have him do all his own daily chores, bed, bath, trash just like the rest of the family does. We did have him in a facility close to our home but to keep him there any length of time would be costly. His Dr. can not admit him for any medical reason because he doesn't have any. He is of sound mind and body just like to cause friction in the home. He has even stated to friend he thinks it funny to make us mad. thanks for letting me vent.

Is he healthy enough to live on his own. There are gov. subsidized apartments that are great. They are for low income seniors and are supervised. The rent is low. You could hire in-home help and cleaning for him. Also, group homes are less expensive and have a more home like feel.
If he is well enough to play "pranks" on you he is healthy enough to be on his own. The last thing anyone needs is friction in their own home...hope you find a solution soon.

I don't understand if he's so 'healthy' then why did he 'wet' on his daughters bathroom floor? Are we talking about just an accident, or is he sicker than anyone realizes? If it was an accident, then I guess having a little boy was out of the question for your sister-in-law then. Cause any mom who's had a boy knows about bathroom pee accidents.

He needs to sit when he pees hes 80 and his urine stream is not strong enough to reach the toliet. Her husband is an a-- and doent want anything to do with his FIL so this was a way to keep him out of their house. He pees on the floor at home and he has to clean it up. We have a problem with both his daughter and his care. One daughter in CA wants hospice called in because the daughter who sees him once every two weeks calls her with her diagnoses of his health. We had the Dr send his last visit, mri and blood work reports to forward to the daughter in CA. His Dr. also sent information on what requirements are for hospice care. Last year the tow daughter turned my husband and I into social services for adult abuse. We were under investagation for 6 months no charge were ever found to be true. SS told the daughter not to file false reports.